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destroytocreate

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destroytocreate

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 July 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3868
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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destroytocreate's page activity

Visits<b>oh_lordy_me</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 5:46am<b>sleepless101</b> - the 06/06/2012 at 8:45pm

destroytocreate's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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destroytocreate's favorite FMLs

Today, I created a poster trying to raise self-harm awareness in teens for my school. They sent me to the counselor, suspended me, and recommended I go to therapy. FML

Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML

#20920631
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39934) - you deserved it (4508)

On 10/14/2013 at 8:16pm - misc - by zzfreakshow (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was using the bathroom at McDonald's when my wallet fell out of my pocket. A lady reached into my stall and tried to grab it. FML

Today, I found out this girl I had sex with lied to me. They weren't razor burn bumps. And I now have them. FML

#20898893
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56753) - you deserved it (36433)

On 09/28/2013 at 7:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66803) - you deserved it (4063)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48755) - you deserved it (6373)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

#20893446
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38769) - you deserved it (2968)

On 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by latter - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

#20891019
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47725) - you deserved it (8940)

On 09/22/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband wanted me to "spice up" our sex life. I guess he didn't count on me vomiting when he came in my mouth. We won't be getting intimate again for a long, long time now. FML

#20888582
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47556) - you deserved it (10589)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found my brother wearing nothing but underwear. That would have been okay if it weren't my lingerie. FML

Today, I went on a blind date. He showed up in a shirt that read, "I f*ck on first dates". FML

#20888198
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50349) - you deserved it (5724)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by ughreally (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML

#20887080
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48137) - you deserved it (3038)

On 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm - love - by ElizaZee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

#20883807
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45618) - you deserved it (8367)

On 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by meganmagee (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54959) - you deserved it (27610)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML



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