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destroytocreate

Offline (the 09/20/2014 at 11:27am) | Search for a member

destroytocreate

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 July 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3700
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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destroytocreate's page activity

Visits<b>oh_lordy_me</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 5:46am<b>sleepless101</b> - the 06/06/2012 at 8:45pm

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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destroytocreate's favorite FMLs

Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started swimming again. FML

#17371338
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39152) - you deserved it (7273)

On 08/04/2011 at 9:47pm - animals - by dukebluedevils13 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

#17338982
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43415) - you deserved it (14500)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51114) - you deserved it (9830)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML

#17326829
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27934) - you deserved it (5183)

On 08/01/2011 at 12:28am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I realized the only reason my boyfriend is dating me is because he has a pimple fetish. FML

#17304312
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37914) - you deserved it (4684)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML

#17298408
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29719) - you deserved it (4872)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:26pm - misc - by someone - United States

Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML

#17297056
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42607) - you deserved it (3333)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)

Today, after eating out with my boyfriend, we went for a drive, but ended up getting into an argument. I reached back to grab my bag and storm out of the car. He thought I was trying to take the restaurant's doggy bag and lunged at me. My boyfriend would rather save chicken than our relationship. FML

#17294621
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31012) - you deserved it (5906)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:56am - love - by Tallulah (woman) - United Kingdom (Croydon)

Today, I have a huge scab on my thigh. What from? My thighs rubbing together. FML

#17294151
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22238) - you deserved it (29871)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:09am - health - by lilykat84 - United States

Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML

#17292941
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32924) - you deserved it (6639)

On 07/29/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I got so bored I made a "to do" list for the week. FML

#17291746
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30818) - you deserved it (10818)

On 07/28/2011 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by RJB - United States

Today, I gave my dad a brochure for anger management. His response? Throwing a chair out the window. FML

#17285530
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34798) - you deserved it (6858)

On 07/28/2011 at 11:25am - health - by 99520 - United States (Indiana)

Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML

#17283766
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8930) - you deserved it (50531)

On 07/28/2011 at 4:15am - work - by Champion the wonder horse - United States

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

#17283152
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29851) - you deserved it (15506)

On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37407) - you deserved it (5600)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)



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