deerhugger

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deerhugger

0Fucked!

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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1654
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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deerhugger's page activity

Visits<b>SarcasticShade</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 3:01pm<b>pataplop</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 4:40pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 8:24am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 3:06am<b>The_Water_Ninja</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 12:33am<b>13ky13</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 1:50pm<b>SDTD10</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 1:33pm<b>superpoptart</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 1:24am<b>ncsteven10101010</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 12:50am

deerhugger's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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deerhugger's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML

by AW / 01/10/2011 at 7:48am / Health

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 12:20am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I lied when my therapist asked why I preferred Tuesday morning appointments. It's actually because World of Warcraft is down for regularly scheduled maintenance. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2010 at 10:23am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2010 at 5:55am / Turkey (Istanbul) / Animals

Today, I sent the girl I like a Twinkie with a note saying "Enjoy! You deserve it". I found out later through an angry email that someone had written "you damn fatty" on the end of the note. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2010 at 7:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked into my home office and said F*** you! Then she ran to my husband and said "Did I say it right?" FML

by Ashley Marshburn / 10/17/2010 at 9:55am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

by Username / 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm / Kids

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, whilst I was working in McDonald's, a customer threw their Quarterpounder at me because it had pickles and he said he didn't want any pickles in his burger. I didn't even serve him. I'd just started my shift. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2010 at 6:31am / United Kingdom (London) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

by fartwoman / 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was walking down the street when I heard a loud splashing noise to my right. I looked over only to see a woman not squatting but bending over, spreading her cheeks, peeing a horse-sized amount of pee. I can't un-see this. FML

by disturbed / 03/16/2010 at 9:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML

by aaalias34 / 02/26/2010 at 6:13am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, as I went to the bathroom in a port-a-potty at a park, I forgot to lock the door. A little girl opens the door and then slams it right away. As she walked away I heard her say "no, there's a man in there". I'm a woman. FML

by crappy_day / 01/08/2010 at 9:09pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I went to the bathroom in a port-a-potty at a park, I forgot to lock the door. A little girl opens the door and then slams it right away. As she walked away I heard her say "no, there's a man in there". I'm a woman. FML

by crappy_day / 01/08/2010 at 9:09pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

by BathroomMuch / 12/25/2009 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Kids