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deerhugger

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deerhugger
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  • Number of visits : 232
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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deerhugger's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9858) - you deserved it (43835)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my genius boyfriend was trying to remember a particular island in the Caribbean that was used by pirates in the past. I offered up Morocco. I heard him facepalm over the phone. FML

#16367949
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6067) - you deserved it (36652)

On 05/27/2011 at 1:46am - love - by Derp-A-Herp (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

#16263941
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21333) - you deserved it (10599)

On 05/20/2011 at 6:07am - misc - by Max Flynn -

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27715) - you deserved it (15521)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
436 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32071) - you deserved it (9439)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -

­Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML

#15726248
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20396) - you deserved it (2640)

On 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm - animals - by a man - United States (Tennessee)

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35504) - you deserved it (8612)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, my boyfriend got a new rifle. He forced me to watch him stripping it, oiling it, and sliding things into its barrel. We then watched 'Enemy at the Gates'. I basically endured 4 hours of gun porn. FML

#14836344
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24306) - you deserved it (5922)

On 02/04/2011 at 2:59am - intimacy - by missbrit (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30140) - you deserved it (3852)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML

#14531050
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28121) - you deserved it (1933)

On 01/10/2011 at 7:48am - health - by AW -

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

#14376347
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11287) - you deserved it (37849)

On 12/29/2010 at 12:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I lied when my therapist asked why I preferred Tuesday morning appointments. It's actually because World of Warcraft is down for regularly scheduled maintenance. FML

#14034563
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8136) - you deserved it (28429)

On 11/30/2010 at 10:23am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML

#13762266
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25214) - you deserved it (4137)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I sent the girl I like a Twinkie with a note saying "Enjoy! You deserve it". I found out later through an angry email that someone had written "you damn fatty" on the end of the note. FML

#13641335
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21422) - you deserved it (4840)

On 10/29/2010 at 7:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked into my home office and said F*** you! Then she ran to my husband and said "Did I say it right?" FML

#13484178
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28599) - you deserved it (3606)

On 10/17/2010 at 9:55am - kids - by Ashley Marshburn - United States (North Carolina)



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