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dealwithfire

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dealwithfire

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 27 October 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 405
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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dealwithfire's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 4:23pm<b>dvsblade</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 11:43pm<b>moron011</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 12:00am

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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dealwithfire's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my foot stuck in the car seat belt. I kept pulling to loosen it up but it just kept getting tighter till my foot was in the air, so I started panicking and eventually started crying. My boyfriend had to pull over and save me from a seat belt. FML

#19368346
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8447) - you deserved it (23276)

On 03/29/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by greeneyedpothead - United States (California)

Today, I found out my wife cheated on me with a guy from her work three times, two months before I proposed to her. She decided to tell me three months into our marriage. FML

#19177971
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31851) - you deserved it (2224)

On 02/27/2012 at 9:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

#18345679
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12053) - you deserved it (56641)

On 11/25/2011 at 10:02am - intimacy - by Dickhead - Lebanon

Today, I took my clothes off in front of my girlfriend for the first time. She made a weird face for a moment, then burst into laughter. She couldn't stop laughing, no matter how hard she tried. FML

#17398167
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38932) - you deserved it (4662)

On 08/07/2011 at 3:43pm - intimacy - by Eddie (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32269) - you deserved it (92341)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10352) - you deserved it (43339)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said "It turns him on." FML

#16945006
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46375) - you deserved it (4876)

On 07/02/2011 at 2:44am - intimacy - by beardedlady - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61583) - you deserved it (7542)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend asked if we could spice up our sex life. She didn't think it was too funny when I laid out all of our spices on the bed. She now refuses to have sex. FML

#16200408
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22021) - you deserved it (63576)

On 05/16/2011 at 1:40am - intimacy - by phoenix101 -

Today, I discovered my wife has a YouTube channel dedicated to 20 second videos of her wearing a fake mustache and making weird sounds. FML

#16076748
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42148) - you deserved it (6925)

On 05/07/2011 at 9:56am - love - by wtfiswrongwithher - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

#15947062
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13459) - you deserved it (39753)

On 04/27/2011 at 9:35am - kids - by BadgerSpirit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized I don't know which is sadder: the fact I have detailed conversations with myself in my car, or that I bought a Bluetooth earpiece so that I can do it in public without people thinking I'm a complete lunatic. FML

#15555921
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34973) - you deserved it (25468)

On 03/30/2011 at 12:54am - health - by shelby - United States

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

#15473081
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54814) - you deserved it (4239)

On 03/24/2011 at 9:30pm - love - by tannerpaul -

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

#15205288
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54014) - you deserved it (4546) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42735) - you deserved it (27647) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins



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