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dealwithfire

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dealwithfire
  • Town/Country : Colorado springs, united states
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 27 October 1991 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 51
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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dealwithfire's favorite FMLs

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

#20649343
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43854) - you deserved it (9418)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55269) - you deserved it (4753)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

#20640565
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57335) - you deserved it (8132)

On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

#20550602
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37450) - you deserved it (14811)

On 03/19/2013 at 8:31am - intimacy - by fredo (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I advised my daughter to not drink a Coke before bed. She smiled at me and reassured me that it could be balanced out with sleeping pills. I'm raising a future drug addict. FML

#20547328
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26464) - you deserved it (4861)

On 03/17/2013 at 6:25am - kids - by hejdixjeln - United States (Illinois)

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14179) - you deserved it (49527)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33514) - you deserved it (7834)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37377) - you deserved it (4145) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

#20482822
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23761) - you deserved it (2455)

On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

#20462136
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31167) - you deserved it (3351)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by WTF (man) -

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22611) - you deserved it (5540)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML

#20168543
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12857) - you deserved it (935)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by mountains - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20136682
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14697) - you deserved it (2191)

On 10/28/2012 at 8:29am - work - by radioinvader (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML

#20124199
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12441) - you deserved it (1296)

On 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Watchtower? More like fortress. (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, while making love to my wife, I felt adventurous and told her to hit me. She didn't so much as hesitate before savagely slapping me with her ring hand. Now I'm back home from the hospital, with stitches closing up a huge gash on my cheek. FML

#20124147
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8796) - you deserved it (21515)

On 10/19/2012 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Czech Republic (Jihomoravsky kraj)



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