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darkangel8799

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darkangel8799

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  • Number of visits : 366
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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darkangel8799's page activity

Visits<b>EricaMarie18</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 11:00pm<b>whateverwillwork</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 2:07pm

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darkangel8799's favorite FMLs

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35954) - you deserved it (18868)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, as a support worker, I spent 45 minutes making various attempts to calm a violent autistic kid. Just as soon as I was sure the crisis was over, he beat me as hard as he could with the "Things I Can Do When I'm Mad" book I'd given him. FML

#18244836
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24623) - you deserved it (3318)

On 11/14/2011 at 8:37am - work - by metallifreak44 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML

#15934305
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44788) - you deserved it (5618)

On 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by Scarlett - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

#14244389
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33458) - you deserved it (3921)

On 12/18/2010 at 4:11am - love - by anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML

#13927798
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17599) - you deserved it (48538)

On 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm - intimacy - by sydysyd (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend offered to give me a piggyback ride from the house to the car as means of avoiding walking in mud. Both aware of how tall he is, he crouched extra low and I jumped extra hard. This makes for a terrible example of leapfrog, and a faceplant in the mud. FML

#9087167
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20512) - you deserved it (8102)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

#5811871
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8742) - you deserved it (105976)

On 10/13/2009 at 2:54am - love - by PanFace (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was with her. No, let me correct myself. Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was in her. FML

#4574797
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70268) - you deserved it (10559)

On 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML

#3261545
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63201) - you deserved it (26331)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:05am - kids - by poormom (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The first I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and, on the way home, hooked up in the back seat. FML

#1014149
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98879) - you deserved it (15047)

On 04/16/2009 at 4:40am - intimacy - by sad_gay (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm heading towards my car clutching a bunch of flowers for my girlfriend, when along comes a sweet old lady who says: "it's not flowers she wants, it's some lovin'!". The elderly sure aren't what they used to be. FML

#449
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22202) - you deserved it (3059)

On 12/04/2008 at 6:16am - misc - by DarkPhoenix - Sent from mobile version



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