About daAce77 : I'm just on here to have fun. If you're offended by any of my comments...don't be they're just jokes and I obviously have other serious views of FML situations.
Now with all that said. STOP CREEPING ON ME!
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and he came running in saying "Mummy my plum is wet", I told him it was fine and bit a bit off to prove it. He looked at me and said "No Mummy! Can you wash it please, I dropped it in my potty". I feel ill. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24390) - you deserved it (6250)
On 08/28/2011 at 5:25pm - kids - by cjay2200 - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)
Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25388) - you deserved it (36784)
On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States
Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25113) - you deserved it (2064)
On 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Alexis - United States (Virginia)
Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30673) - you deserved it (2349)
On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)
Today, at a party I bumped into a friend of my ex. We caught the same bus home. He started telling me about my ex's "totally insane" ex-girlfriend. He refused to believe me when I told him he was talking about me. I had to sit there for half an hour as my personality was ripped to shreds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21852) - you deserved it (3697)
On 08/23/2011 at 10:44pm - love - by Embarassed (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, over a year on from my parents telling me my dog had died, I went to the shelter to volunteer, and saw my old dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38158) - you deserved it (1526)
On 08/21/2011 at 1:51am - animals - by Dogless - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27053) - you deserved it (3321)
On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. I called AAA, and they said it would take 2 hours to get there. They called 2 hours later saying they got a flat tire and would be there in another 2 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31942) - you deserved it (2488)
On 08/17/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, I received a message on Facebook from a guy I've liked for a year. He asked me if I wanted to hang out, so I said yes. When I walked out to his car later on, he gave me a really confused look. Apparently I was on my brother's Facebook, and he'd never logged out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28241) - you deserved it (8412)
On 08/15/2011 at 12:20pm - love - by Leota (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33181) - you deserved it (3008)
On 08/12/2011 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by -_- - United States
Today, I was preparing food in the microwave. I hadn't noticed that a fly had flown in until I noticed its melted corpse engraved into my hot-pocket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23371) - you deserved it (3992)
On 08/10/2011 at 1:47pm - animals - by Ser17 - United States
Today, I went to my favorite all you can eat buffet. The cook tapped my shoulder and told me to stop eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21072) - you deserved it (12289)
On 08/08/2011 at 7:58pm - health - by Kathryn - United States (New York)
Today, while watching tv at my mother's house, a tornado warning came across the screen. After being in the dark nasty basement for half an hour, my mom realizes she was watching a recorded show, and that tornado warning was for 2 weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25792) - you deserved it (3338)
On 08/07/2011 at 1:29am - misc - by cargaljen - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28542) - you deserved it (8924)
On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28529) - you deserved it (2520)
On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Monday 20 May 2013
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