crackpotL

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Offline (the 06/23/2016 at 6:11pm)

crackpotL

1Fucked!

crackpotLcrackpotL
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 September 1984 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2284
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About crackpotL :

crackpotL's page activity

Visits<b>burgermike92</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 10:51pm<b>French_giirl</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 5:10pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 4:34pm<b>demix</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 5:10am<b>BlueBomberXZ</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 10:37am<b>jfreeman86</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 2:05am<b>sas313</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 6:50pm<b>raven83</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 7:50am<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 6:25pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 6:19pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 12:39pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 8:09am<b>singer0421</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 11:56pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 7:23pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 1:56pm<b>a1blue</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 12:10am<b>Devyn333</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 11:48pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 3:58pm

Fucked!<b>killjoyx</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:51pm

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crackpotL's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

by kalikanna / 07/07/2012 at 2:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

by ww2freak / 06/13/2012 at 9:17pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

by lafinesse / 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML

by Class / 05/11/2012 at 7:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

by doggone / 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

by viviham / 05/04/2012 at 8:08am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

by Tristansefam1367 / 03/12/2012 at 9:11am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

by starboy / 03/10/2012 at 1:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

by parkertownparadise / 02/16/2012 at 2:43am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML

by cieee / 02/13/2012 at 2:09am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my wife purposely eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to get out of kissing me. I'm deathly allergic to peanuts. FML

by Allergic / 01/24/2012 at 12:31pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was surprised that my husband suggested we take a shower together to save water. He also suggested we should wear our bathing suits so we don't have to see each others "privates." FML

by anonymous / 01/08/2012 at 7:24am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy