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crackpotL

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crackpotL

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 September 1984 (30 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1599
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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crackpotL's page activity

Visits<b>Abbey1598</b> - 2 hours ago<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:20am<b>cutiepie292929</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 3:59am<b>gunnerette</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 5:17pm<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 11:41am<b>Dowbo</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:20am<b>NoCraicAtAll</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 8:17am<b>laamjidkek</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 5:36pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 4:22pm<b>buckydargon</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 5:45am<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 1:12am<b>Kaboom3971</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 12:15am<b>cakefete2</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 6:53pm<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:26pm<b>Godsofdracos</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 4:30pm<b>j_cat187</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 11:02am<b>tayymeds</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:52pm<b>gmian</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 11:56pm

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crackpotL's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

#20098468
394 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33380) - you deserved it (2555)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML

#20087243
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15743) - you deserved it (30543)

On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62494) - you deserved it (3311)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26187) - you deserved it (3015)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I finally decided to introduce my boyfriend to my parents. Surprisingly, he and my father already knew each other, so I asked him how they met. Now I know where my boyfriend gets all his weed. FML

#20057214
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27335) - you deserved it (3539)

On 09/04/2012 at 9:51am - misc - by UnknownOperation (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

#20037909
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37363) - you deserved it (10881) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

#20037281
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6450) - you deserved it (72181)

On 08/23/2012 at 9:42am - misc - by TheBeautifulOne (woman) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given them. The list is in chronological order. She's not only not the highest rated, she's not last on the list. FML

#20024660
524 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11580) - you deserved it (154447)

On 08/16/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML

#19939596
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34320) - you deserved it (39713)

On 07/15/2012 at 1:34am - intimacy - by oops - United States

Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML

#19918073
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18388) - you deserved it (36757)

On 07/10/2012 at 6:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32076) - you deserved it (3814)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
405 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39838) - you deserved it (4251)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

#19791702
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12892) - you deserved it (26697)

On 06/15/2012 at 10:21am - kids - by habbsrule - Canada

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

#19784207
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13205) - you deserved it (23693)

On 06/13/2012 at 9:17pm - misc - by ww2freak - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39457) - you deserved it (4080) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -



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