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crackpotL's favorite FMLs
Today, while vacationing with my boyfriend of 9 years, he started writing "Wi" in the sand. I instantly hoped he was going to propose by writing, "Will you marry me" on the beach. He spelled out "wiener" instead. FML
by ForeverAGirlfriend / 06/13/2016 at 12:40am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/20/2016 at 12:59pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by sociallyawkward / 05/18/2016 at 9:52pm / United States (Georgia) / Money
Today, I woke up to a horrible smell only to realize that my dog had peed all over my leg cast during the night. I can't get another one because the closest doctors are all on Christmas vacation. Guess this is an early Christmas present from my dog. FML
by ChaoticGamer / 12/23/2015 at 10:15am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I put one of those checkout dividers in front of my groceries on the conveyor belt in the supermarket. The guy standing in front of me turned around, looked me straight in the eye and said "I don't trust you." as he put a second divider between our groceries. FML
by Quendolin / 11/09/2015 at 9:07am / Germany / Miscellaneous
Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, I tried baking my own bread to save food money. Unfortunately I screwed it up, prompting my wife to look at me pityingly and say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out. I have erectile dysfunction, and she constantly insults me like this. FML
by Anonymous / 01/09/2015 at 3:16pm / United States / Health
by Mr_snuggels / 12/24/2014 at 3:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by eh / 10/06/2014 at 3:12pm / Azerbaijan (Baki) / Miscellaneous
by kj1 / 02/17/2014 at 1:28pm / United States (Utah) / Love
by Cian_1 / 11/25/2013 at 6:22am / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Health
Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Intimacy
by coldstar / 07/18/2013 at 5:06am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Animals
by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous