coolkid_matt

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coolkid_matt

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 July 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4226
  • Number of comments : 95
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About coolkid_matt : Hey :)

I'm Matt.

I play football.
I like basketball - Miami Heat FTW.
I like hip hop, rap, dubstep, drumstep & other electronic music :)

Message me if you'd like to know more though I may not be on often, usually just on my iphone :)

coolkid_matt's page activity

Visits<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 2:14pm<b>pat3212</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 11:19pm<b>wellthisisntgood</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 1:55pm<b>2simz</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 3:35am<b>tatteredshirt</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 11:14am<b>jill97</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 11:07am<b>am1717</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 5:06pm<b>konan__</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 2:25am<b>MainCreator</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 10:49am<b>IAm123</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 3:09pm<b>britbear0731</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 12:35pm<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 12:56pm<b>UnknownTracker</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 2:46am<b>Varieus</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 4:28am<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 6:47pm<b>MiLM</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 10:48am<b>Hunthas</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:48am<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 11:52pm

Fucked!<b>IAm123</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 1:09am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 10:07pm

coolkid_matt's FML badges

Judgmental

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See all of coolkid_matt's badges

coolkid_matt's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

by Anonymous / 09/21/2011 at 2:39pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML

by ThisBlows / 09/21/2011 at 1:20pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to stop a teenage boy from entering the woman's bathroom. When he argued with me I had him thrown out. Turns out, according to their parents and driver's license, it was a girl. FML

by fluke / 09/19/2011 at 1:24pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML

by ohgodwhy / 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML

by shithead / 09/18/2011 at 4:17pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my cousin's house. We weren't spending time together because he was always texting. After a couple of minutes, I got jealous. I played a ringtone on my cell, and "answered" it. I had a whole conversation with nobody in an attempt to seem somewhat more popular than a 10-year-old. FML

by ForeverAlone / 09/15/2011 at 5:46pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a bar with my friend, when I noticed a young lad at a table near to us. I thought it'd be funny to jeer and flick peanuts at him. I went to the restroom, only to come back to my friend face-down on the floor. Turns out the guy fucked him up instead, and now he won't talk to me. FML

by Cooper491 / 09/15/2011 at 5:22pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

by Scott / 09/15/2011 at 3:34am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I had my parents over at my new apartment. As I was telling them how quiet and peaceful my new place is, we could hear my neighbors talking nasty to each other before launching into a full-blown sex ordeal. FML

by holler / 09/15/2011 at 12:22am / Japan (Tokyo) / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML

by unknown / 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML

by wf / 09/14/2011 at 2:11pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2011 at 12:34pm / United States (Kansas) / Health