Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About coolkid_matt : Hey :)
I play football.
I like basketball - Miami Heat FTW.
I like hip hop, rap, dubstep, drumstep & other electronic music :)
Message me if you'd like to know more though I may not be on often, usually just on my iphone :)
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, I had to sit through 10 minute of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML
Today.!! !! I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection !! I asked if he could take me to the doctor !! He responded by saying.!! !! "Just shove some ice up there !! It'll go away." FML
Today, mah mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then looool informed me that, for as long as mah girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
TODAY, I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH A CLOGGED MILK GLAND. I AM NOT, NOR HAVE EVER BEEN, PREGNANT AND THEREFORE HAVE ALSO NEVER BREASTFED. THIS CONDITION IS CAUSED BY MAH BOYFRIEND'S OVER-ACTIVE URGE TO SUCK ON MAH NIPPLES. I'M IN HORRIBLE PAIN, AND HE WON'T STOP LAUGHING. FML
Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar startd trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, ( I usd to be a tough guy lyk you. Then I took an arrow in the knee. ) The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy . She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts . Trying to make her feel better, I said I dated smaller breasts . She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises . mega FML
TODAY , I MADE A FAKE FACEBOOK ACCOUNT FIR A GIRL , AND THEN SET MAH RELATIONSHIP STATUS TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE THE FAKE PERSON WAS MAH GIRLFRIEND . SOMEONE FOUND OUT AND HACKED THE FAKE ACCOUNT . MY FAKE GIRLFRIEND JUST DUMPED ME OVER FACEBOOK . FML
Friday 27 March 2015