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cognauticcreix

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cognauticcreix

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 June 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 367
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About cognauticcreix : I'm still figuring out what anyone would actually give a shit about in one of these things.

cognauticcreix's page activity

Visits<b>DeadxTime</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 9:33am<b>WockaFloctapus</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 2:16am<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 1:03am<b>DemolitionLovers</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 9:10pm<b>Lindahhxd</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 12:45am<b>gigi1818</b> - the 04/13/2013 at 10:30am<b>Itsbinkyyo</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 10:46pm<b>xEyesSetToKillx</b> - the 02/19/2013 at 2:34am<b>footcheezeez</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 11:27pm<b>Latressa298</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 3:58pm<b>sunkissedluster</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 5:22am<b>emily20</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 8:34am<b>DDCA</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 4:06am<b>cuponoodles34</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 2:49am<b>VolleyAly</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 12:50am<b>fatlemonjefferso</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 12:35am<b>gibbyrules</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 12:23am<b>Charleybelle</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 12:20am

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cognauticcreix's favorite FMLs

Today, after getting into an argument with my dad, he told me that I would make a great ex wife one day. FML

#20467602
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28874) - you deserved it (6611)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:51am - love - by Claire - United States (Maryland)

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34689) - you deserved it (3397)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50316) - you deserved it (4838)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

#20444730
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27663) - you deserved it (3531)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I bought myself a pair of beautiful, hand-crafted earrings with lighthouses on them. My mother was quick to point out the lighthouses look like dicks. I don't think I can ever wear them again. FML

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML

#20439162
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30719) - you deserved it (13548)

On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML

#20423285
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44135) - you deserved it (3443)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:32am - love - by Jolene - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

#20409224
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29581) - you deserved it (6156)

On 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I caught my dog chewing on a tampon applicator. I tried to grab it from him, but he wanted to play "keep away" and ran outside. Like a dumbass, I chased after him in my underwear, earning myself the attention of my neighbors on each side of my driveway. FML

#20408937
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10216) - you deserved it (28336)

On 12/20/2012 at 1:17pm - misc - by ScoozieBooze (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was at my job as a cashier when a man called me his "Grocery Slave." I was almost offended, but then I thought about my salary. I am a Grocery Slave. FML

Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML

#20398877
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27930) - you deserved it (1815)

On 12/14/2012 at 1:44am - health - by mysidesaresplitting - United States (Michigan)

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

#20398504
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26526) - you deserved it (4931) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France

Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML

#20201491
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39701) - you deserved it (2440)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my doctor finally prescribed me some medication for my arthritis. The cap was insanely well-secured, and my hands were too racked with pain to get it off. FML

#20197805
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25937) - you deserved it (1477)

On 12/09/2012 at 3:03pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was snooping around in my parents' closet to see what I would get for Christmas, when I came across a UPS package. It was the video game I ordered off eBay 3 weeks ago, addressed to me. They told me it had never arrived and said I should ask Santa to bring it to me. FML

#20195835
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28347) - you deserved it (4376)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)



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