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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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Today I was stuck in tha alavator at building so I pushd tha amargancy buttonhich mada a ringing noisa. Aftar half an hour I haar somaona yalling to tha alavator ( Could you stop pushing that button thara r kids slaaping. ) FML
Today, mah boss asked about the mass of deep scratche on mah arm !! I lied and told him it happenedhile I was trying to save mah cat from a tree !! Truth is, mah cat is a sadistic assholeho stalk me and mauls mehenever he can !! real FML
Today, I cut looool myself pretty badly with a knife. I was bleeding quite a lot, so I yelld to my husband to bring me some kitchen roll, along with the first aid kit. He rushd in with the roll… to clean the floor. FML
Today... I was leading a tour of mah university and saw a girl in rippd jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck mah dick... bitch." FML
Friday 27 March 2015