Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (24 hours ago) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 August 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1885
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 15 posted

About claudio117 : FML

claudio117's page activity

Visits<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 11:03am<b>remylx</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 9:52am<b>carebear1228</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 10:05pm<b>nettrol</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 10:43pm<b>Plastinate</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 6:58am<b>Malteser95</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 2:50pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 1:53pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 3:23am<b>mip_92</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 5:00pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:13am<b>SandyBella</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 6:45am<b>Doberman101</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 2:08pm<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:53pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 6:22am<b>PHILLIESFAN77</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 6:56am<b>horsehaed7</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 3:22pm<b>Josiiee</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 7:15pm<b>Mexicandruglord</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 5:58pm

claudio117's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of claudio117's badges

claudio117's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42329) - you deserved it (3157)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband sent me a link to an article titled "5 ways you are unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage." FML

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML


I agree, your life sucks (34668) - you deserved it (5823)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44279) - you deserved it (3129)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50960) - you deserved it (14495)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use "stranger danger". Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50448) - you deserved it (6690)

On 05/08/2014 at 11:01pm - kids - by imnotastranger (man) -

Today, while I was making dinner, my husband argued that our new dog has intelligence issues, and we should give him away. I angrily defended the poor thing, and had almost won, until the dog walked over and licked the inside of the hot oven door. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45510) - you deserved it (5919)

On 04/30/2014 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm in the process of adopting a child. When I called my mom to tell her the news, she just said, "Oh honey, don't adopt, it's the worst decision you'll ever make." I'm adopted. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50384) - you deserved it (3191)

On 04/11/2014 at 5:58pm - kids - by babylove - South Africa

Today, my mother decided to tell me about how my twin brother almost killed me in the womb when his cord wrapped around my neck. When she left the room, he said, "You won't be so lucky next time." FML


I agree, your life sucks (45536) - you deserved it (4535)

On 03/08/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about some recent family drama my sister has been causing. He quickly lost interest and started jacking off right next to me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44887) - you deserved it (7877)

On 02/25/2014 at 11:59am - love - by jill (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend he was like an animal in bed. He responded saying I was like a dead animal in bed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48004) - you deserved it (17142)

On 02/06/2014 at 11:48pm - intimacy - by cryface (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML


I agree, your life sucks (57545) - you deserved it (7034)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:50am - kids - by LadyDeadpool88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had a seizure in class. Being an epileptic, I had warned my professor of the possibility that I could have one in class. She was understanding and seemed very concerned about my issue at the time. After I had the seizure, however, she asked me if I had ever tried exorcism. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47247) - you deserved it (2732)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:00am - health - by seizuregirl17 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized I need to start hitting the gym, when my boyfriend actually utilized my love handles during sex. FML

Today, I got an angry call to the phone shop where I work. The caller demanded that we give him his money back. His reason? He said he'd been tricked because his phone got ruined by water "even though he was using the waterproof application". FML


C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: