Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

charvisioku

Search for a member

charvisioku

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 August 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5203
  • Number of comments : 766
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About charvisioku : Never thought I'd have "favourite commenters" on a site but... well, here they are:

DocBastard - dry humour's always a win in my book... I always picture him as being like House in real life.

sens3sfail - just always makes me chuckle

Pleonasm - king of puns

charvisioku's page activity

Visits<b>Skyzeri</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:37pm<b>jonloran</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:58am<b>creeperdevon</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 6:48am<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 11:06am<b>gogisworld</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 2:25pm<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 10:09am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 7:20am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 4:30pm<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 9:45pm<b>jane35</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 2:46pm<b>mcronin</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 5:05pm<b>Sonotsuave</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 7:36pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 10:33am<b>tiggerlover100</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:25am<b>rafa015</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:41am<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 2:51am<b>bjf21</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 5:09pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 2:22am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:20pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 10:31pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:33pm<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:51am<b>BL3SStheFALL3N</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 1:27am

charvisioku's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of charvisioku's badges

charvisioku's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

#19420355
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25572) - you deserved it (9489)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized my Internet addiction had gone too far when I tried to Google what was in my freezer. FML

#19413204
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6377) - you deserved it (25279)

On 04/05/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "new pirate" in the office. FML

#19408949
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13001) - you deserved it (17949)

On 04/04/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML

#19406628
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13771) - you deserved it (31632)

On 04/04/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML

#19406343
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8233) - you deserved it (37421)

On 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by woohoo420 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML

#19394334
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25940) - you deserved it (9364)

On 04/02/2012 at 10:02am - love - by IloveJapan (woman) - Japan

Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML

#19387601
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16849) - you deserved it (30245)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:03am - love - by Jeff make - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26869) - you deserved it (4447)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30581) - you deserved it (3969)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML

#18766108
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44407) - you deserved it (4535)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - India

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33359) - you deserved it (9220)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, I have my first university lecture on lab safety. Having gone out the night before with my house-mates, I have the worst hangover of my life, and have to listen for an hour and a half while they loudly demonstrate the types of alarms we'll hear in different kinds of emergencies. FML

#18138100
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12330) - you deserved it (47018)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by ...loud noises...urgh... (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

#17911621
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25487) - you deserved it (20039)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, my grandmother refused to wear clothes. FML

#17633195
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29730) - you deserved it (2359)

On 09/01/2011 at 1:29am - misc - by bob - United States



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: