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caroline43872's favorite FMLs
by Randomspaghetti / 09/15/2016 at 5:11pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by an unlucky man / 08/05/2016 at 5:37am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was talking to a customer, when I choked on my spit. After I could breathe again I was so embarrassed I said the first thing that popped into my head, which was, "I'm sorry, I don't know how to swallow." FML
by Lil Bro / 07/16/2016 at 10:05pm / United Kingdom (Sandwell) / Intimacy
by captainuniverse / 05/14/2016 at 1:53am / United States (Tennessee) / Kids
Today, I came home from work to my hot roommate cooking and wearing nothing but an apron. She pulled me into her room and things went great. At least, they did before I woke up in the break room with my coworkers and boss all gathered around, listening to me talking in my sleep. FML
by Dirty_Mind_69 / 07/20/2013 at 4:35am / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by Ihatemyjob / 03/17/2013 at 11:14pm / United States (Ohio) / Work
by guy / 03/15/2013 at 1:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML
by Anonymous / 02/17/2013 at 12:56am / United States / Miscellaneous
by fviz / 02/07/2013 at 4:51am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
by Female / 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm / Australia (Victoria) / Kids
Today, I was at a party with my crush. The collar on his shirt was sticking up so I fixed it for him. He gave me a hug and said, "Aww you're so good to me. You're like my mother. You can be my college mother." I got mother-zoned. FML
by shiney100893 / 01/14/2013 at 7:56am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love
Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML
by Drewbie / 01/13/2013 at 3:53am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids