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calilovesneb

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calilovesneb

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 May 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3211
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About calilovesneb : .

calilovesneb's page activity

Visits<b>kantalita_claire</b> - 9 hours ago<b>paolino</b> - yesterday at 3:29pm<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 5:18pm<b>mchael121989</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 3:25am<b>FunnyDude1215</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:53am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 9:39am<b>luminalunii69</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 11:03pm<b>insanecutie</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 10:50am<b>barkerman00</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 10:57pm<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 5:00pm<b>gingerJ</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:19pm<b>miianah1</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 1:57am<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 8:21am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 6:21pm<b>Journiexo</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:08am<b>jcroisdale</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:29pm<b>Bricktothehead</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 6:59pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:56pm

Liked!<b>kantalita_claire</b> - 3 hours ago<b>derp_taco</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 5:59am

calilovesneb's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of calilovesneb's badges

calilovesneb's favorite FMLs

Today, I was speaking to my mother on the phone, when she mentioned that my dad had surprised her last week with a pearl necklace. Before I could quite grasp what was going on, I'd popped a boner and visualised the scene. What the hell is wrong with me? FML

#19987975
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11195) - you deserved it (39268)

On 07/27/2012 at 8:30pm - intimacy - by clayton (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my daughter proudly showed me her new tattoo sleeve, which is made up of an angry cupcake, hemp leaves, and a My Little Pony character. She's almost 30, still unemployed, and still lives in my home. I now have no hope of her ever becoming a productive member of society. FML

#19987541
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24517) - you deserved it (7252)

On 07/27/2012 at 3:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Ostfold)

Today, I asked my husband if he knew what day it was. His answer was, "garbage day?" It's our six-year anniversary. FML

#19987123
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21510) - you deserved it (2993)

On 07/27/2012 at 10:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came out to my mom as a lesbian. She told me that it was impossible, because since she isn't one, she therefore couldn't have given birth to one. She still won't believe me. FML

#19984576
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25806) - you deserved it (3451)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:04am - misc - by Just Me (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the hospital. I had recently broken my arm, and had to have it re-broken. I've secretly been a lesbian for years. Guess who came out to her strict Christian parents while on anesthetics. FML

#19982177
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31464) - you deserved it (4464)

On 07/24/2012 at 7:44pm - love - by Arthurie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in the hospital. I had recently broken my arm, and had to have it re-broken. I've secretly been a lesbian for years. Guess who came out to her strict Christian parents while on anesthetics. FML

#19982177
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31464) - you deserved it (4464)

On 07/24/2012 at 7:44pm - love - by Arthurie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML

#19974801
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23453) - you deserved it (1901)

On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML

#19964691
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4317) - you deserved it (39166)

On 07/20/2012 at 5:38pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)

Today, I had to very clearly explain to my mother, in public, why you cannot get cancer from eating too much ketchup. FML

#19961052
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18087) - you deserved it (2037)

On 07/19/2012 at 10:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was having a really vivid dream in which I had to take a penalty kick to win the World Cup for the USA. I took the kick, but in reality, I smashed my foot against my bedroom wall and broke four of my toes. I also missed the kick in my dream. FML

#19959612
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25453) - you deserved it (2954)

On 07/19/2012 at 4:05pm - health - by owwwww - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10738) - you deserved it (36872)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, an idiot decided it would be fun to light up a firecracker in front of our house. It ended with firetrucks, a black yard, and yet somehow the weeds survived. FML

#19958598
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20266) - you deserved it (1728)

On 07/19/2012 at 11:30am - misc - by ThatGirl (woman) - United States

Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML

#19949441
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21132) - you deserved it (4915)

On 07/17/2012 at 9:54am - health - by Anonymous - Greece (Attiki)

Today, my husband and I stopped at a scenic overlook on top of a mountain. I looked down and noticed several small shells and excitedly called him over. I said, "I can't believe I found fossils here!" The moment it came out of my mouth, I realized they were pistachio shells. So did he. FML

#19948855
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6428) - you deserved it (20650)

On 07/17/2012 at 4:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

#19936728
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19013) - you deserved it (4498)

On 07/14/2012 at 10:43am - health - by Anonymous - Japan (Tokyo)



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