calilovesneb

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calilovesneb

18Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 May 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5421
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About calilovesneb : .

calilovesneb's page activity

Visits<b>billboob</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:07pm<b>roman11</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 8:09am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 6:26pm<b>ZiaBerry</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 3:34am<b>Jeremybking</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 11:04pm<b>george_s_4</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 7:54am<b>Helipilot86</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 1:00pm<b>Gooddrark</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 5:25pm<b>ImaginaryFuture</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 3:38am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 12:22pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:10pm<b>Jbam1997</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 12:50pm<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 6:54pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 6:12pm<b>l4urenz</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 8:23am<b>player20270</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 6:52am<b>Kinetic_King</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 12:10pm<b>Joel17</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 1:57pm

Fucked!<b>billboob</b> - yesterday at 1:08am<b>ZiaBerry</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 9:34am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 5:22pm<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 3:41pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 8:30am<b>FieldLeftBlank</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 12:18am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 3:11am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:37pm<b>axfabxdisaster</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 9:27pm<b>dom_g</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 7:10am<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:54am<b>kieraphernelia</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:47am<b>GalaxyShots</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 1:45pm<b>arano</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 1:25am<b>hasanjk</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 3:27pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:20am<b>derp_taco</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 5:59am

calilovesneb's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of calilovesneb's badges

calilovesneb's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally confronted my boyfriend and asked him if he was cheating on me. He got flustered and said, "Technically, I'm cheating with you, not on you." FML

by nice one / 08/30/2012 at 11:24am / Love

Today, I finally confronted my boyfriend and asked him if he was cheating on me. He got flustered and said, "Technically, I'm cheating with you, not on you." FML

by nice one / 08/30/2012 at 11:24am / Love

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

by Sarah / 08/30/2012 at 8:58am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2012 at 5:37pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, there's a cricket in my apartment. I don't know if I'm more annoyed by the fact that it somehow got up three flights of stairs to get here, or that my cat is so excited about it that he's jumping on me and howling in my face to announce the cricket's presence instead of killing it. FML

by calivianya / 08/28/2012 at 12:49am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at a job interview. The interviewer spoke to me for a few minutes, then said she would be right back, and left. I was left alone in a room for an hour and a half believing that it was a patience test. They closed the store for the day, leaving me in the interview room. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2012 at 11:31pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I had to give my boyfriend an enema. FML

by coop7291 / 08/24/2012 at 1:21am / United States / Health

Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML

by Confused / 08/22/2012 at 12:33pm / Spain (Madrid) / Intimacy

Today, after a few weeks of smuggling a baby caterpillar into work every day just to make sure it ate and stayed alive long enough to turn into a butterfly, it finally did. Before it could fly free, a bird turned it into a snack. FML

by goodbyefriend / 08/21/2012 at 12:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend's phone was stolen. I have no idea who I've been sexting the entire afternoon. FML

by Sexting / 08/21/2012 at 11:29am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I realized the fastest way to wake up isn't from an alarm clock. It's from the warm, wet sensation of your old and senile cat peeing on you and your bed. I swear he was smiling. FML

by jenA / 08/21/2012 at 9:04am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend got a hotel room with a jacuzzi, drinks, and tickets to Six Flags for my birthday. He is currently passed out drunk on the other side of the bed, cursing me out in his sleep. FML

by anon / 08/20/2012 at 1:00am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Health

Today, my mom bitched me out, calling me a selfish pig and saying that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm so conceited. All of this because I started watching the latest episodes of Breaking Bad without her. FML

by elijah / 08/17/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/15/2012 at 7:40am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy