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calilovesneb

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calilovesneb

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 May 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3190
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About calilovesneb : .

calilovesneb's page activity

Visits<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - 24 hours ago<b>mchael121989</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 3:25am<b>FunnyDude1215</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:53am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 9:39am<b>luminalunii69</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 11:03pm<b>insanecutie</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 10:50am<b>barkerman00</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 10:57pm<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 5:00pm<b>gingerJ</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:19pm<b>miianah1</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 1:57am<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 8:21am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 6:21pm<b>Journiexo</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:08am<b>jcroisdale</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:29pm<b>Bricktothehead</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 6:59pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:56pm<b>gmcleod</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 12:35pm<b>gunner_12</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:24am

Liked!<b>derp_taco</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 5:59am

calilovesneb's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of calilovesneb's badges

calilovesneb's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking to a café with my soon-to-be boss. While crossing a busy street, I slipped in a puddle and accidentally grabbed his junk to catch myself. FML

#19299897
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27184) - you deserved it (2976)

On 03/18/2012 at 11:04am - work - by cachucy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML

#19299263
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7997) - you deserved it (41306)

On 03/18/2012 at 7:41am - love - by Austin Franklin - United States

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26640) - you deserved it (4430)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML

#19293533
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34041) - you deserved it (9329)

On 03/17/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by noneedtostress - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dad informed me that my prom dress makes me look chubby from the side, gives me "back fat", and that I wouldn't want to go to prom looking like that. I tried to ignore his hurtful comments and tell myself I was beautiful. Then the clasp broke. FML

#19287255
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25375) - you deserved it (10150)

On 03/16/2012 at 3:13am - misc - by Winx - United States (Alaska)

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

#19282725
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7732) - you deserved it (32791)

On 03/15/2012 at 1:49pm - misc - by StinkyandStupid - United States

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML

#19281835
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28551) - you deserved it (3173)

On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mother and I went to a meeting at my school about a camping trip the students in my grade will be going on. When the time to ask questions came, my mother raised her hand and loudly asked, "What if my child is on their period during the trip?" FML

#19281445
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31330) - you deserved it (2018)

On 03/15/2012 at 3:49am - misc - by Bebefer - United States (California)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML

#19279551
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34677) - you deserved it (2506)

On 03/14/2012 at 10:01pm - misc - by CallaC (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

#19276997
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20336) - you deserved it (3315)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:19am - money - by me - United States (Florida)

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML

#19274332
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17473) - you deserved it (5726)

On 03/13/2012 at 10:32pm - work - by Simms (man) - United States

Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML

#19250410
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35833) - you deserved it (5278)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my new roommate told me he was bisexual. A little concerned, I opened up and told him that made me uncomfortable. His reply: "Oh don't worry, I'm only attracted to good looking guys." FML

#19232371
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12834) - you deserved it (45173)

On 03/07/2012 at 9:01am - misc - by Leland - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I told my fiancé I wanted to hear something romantic. He said, "My dick loves your mouth." I guess that's as good as it's going to get. FML

#19231360
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25912) - you deserved it (6111)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Sharibabi65 (woman) - United States

Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML

#19230527
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39855) - you deserved it (2952)

On 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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