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cabbagebrain

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cabbagebrain

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 12 April 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 541
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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cabbagebrain's favorite FMLs

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

#18650275
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27142) - you deserved it (3846)

On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I had my first kiss with the woman I've been in love with for two years. Right as I kissed her, some guys drove by in a car and threw some soggy spaghetti at me, yelling, "Noob!" FML

#18586943
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31208) - you deserved it (3045)

On 12/23/2011 at 5:53am - love - by johncabbot25 (man) - Canada

Today, after a long therapy session, in which I poured out all my feelings of how happy and in love I am with whom I believe to be my soul-mate, my shrink asked me if I was sure this guy wasn't a figment of my imagination. FML

#18576133
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24953) - you deserved it (3180)

On 12/22/2011 at 12:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML

#18508427
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51344) - you deserved it (3072)

On 12/14/2011 at 12:15am - love - by newlysingle (man) - United States

Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML

#14295570
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35070) - you deserved it (8698)

On 12/22/2010 at 6:43am - kids - by lerouxmaster -

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

#14199055
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (112248) - you deserved it (15219)

On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40146) - you deserved it (9876)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

#13827261
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11744) - you deserved it (49735)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47203) - you deserved it (17356)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

#13756412
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20132) - you deserved it (58979)

On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, it was a little colder than it should be for this time of year, and as a result I was using the heater in my car. Apparently within the last four months, a mouse managed to make his way into my heater vent and die. I can not get the smell of death out of my car. FML

#11164761
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31840) - you deserved it (2852)

On 06/13/2010 at 5:56am - animals - by spenmy - United States (Colorado)



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