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brackaman

Offline (the 11/19/2014 at 2:30am) | Search for a member

brackaman

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 October 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1927
  • Number of comments : 359
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About brackaman : I am the most normal person you will ever meet. *twitch twitch*

brackaman's page activity

Visits<b>tagallopes</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 6:41am<b>wondercat40</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 5:37pm<b>TheBookWyrm</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 6:37pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 1:38pm<b>jenniferwoods41</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 2:12am<b>bonnnie</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 5:13am<b>DMAN80182001</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 2:14pm<b>alljackedup7</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:39pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 8:27am<b>squidgy787</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 9:40am<b>sarah1024</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 7:14am<b>insomniacdreamer</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 1:07am<b>ImHerelegally</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 6:15pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 11:20pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 9:09am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 3:37pm<b>irocksox2014</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 11:46pm<b>theman97</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 8:35pm

brackaman's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of brackaman's badges

brackaman's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML

#20515924
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36886) - you deserved it (10141)

On 02/21/2013 at 3:46am - intimacy - by pornhastaughtmenothing - United States (Washington)

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28491) - you deserved it (5995)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

#20505342
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40592) - you deserved it (4551)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

#20502782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32873) - you deserved it (2427)

On 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Target - United States

Today, my manager asked me for the password to my Internet so she could Skype family since she can't pay her bill. This is the same woman who just a week ago tried to evict me because my rent was an hour late. Trying to be the bigger person, I gave her the password. She changed my password. FML

#20496640
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30966) - you deserved it (16366)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

#20495499
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43228) - you deserved it (4019)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, after nearly 5 months of trying for a baby, I found out my wife has continued to take the pill as it gave her a better idea of her cycle and thus when she'd be "most fertile". FML

#20492131
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41005) - you deserved it (4488)

On 02/03/2013 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by jdrew32 - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

#20486562
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47733) - you deserved it (3569) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version

Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I learned that I look amazing in a little black dress. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife. FML

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

#20470936
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46457) - you deserved it (3969)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35464) - you deserved it (3703)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, my 8-year-old sister matter-of-factly said that she's going to get married before me if I don't stop wearing track pants. FML

#20462592
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14892) - you deserved it (27278)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:28pm - misc - by Kendra_Nine (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML

#20462590
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39550) - you deserved it (3343)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by SF49 - United States

Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML

#20455279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33175) - you deserved it (8284)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)



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