brackaman

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Offline (the 09/17/2016 at 1:35pm)

brackaman

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 October 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3985
  • Number of comments : 362
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About brackaman : I am the most normal person you will ever meet. *twitch twitch*

brackaman's page activity

Visits<b>beffnytutt</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 5:26pm<b>lukey12</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 10:29am<b>hobbs96</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 8:54am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 7:05pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 4:51pm<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 11:37pm<b>chriszoom328</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 12:54am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 9:48pm<b>hasooon</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 1:32am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:22pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:24am<b>crystalbeau98</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 7:01am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 3:51pm<b>facelick</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 1:45pm<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 12:52am<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 1:45am<b>RayTotoro</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 8:13pm<b>zeffra13</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 7:25am

Fucked!<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 1:05am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 3:48am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 9:51pm

brackaman's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of brackaman's badges

brackaman's favorite FMLs

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

by nosestealer / 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

by Never Going Back To The Doctor / 07/04/2013 at 3:03am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got angry after not being able to have an orgasm. What was I angry at? My own hand. FML

by lonely girl / 07/02/2013 at 2:47am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, my mom left for a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me and made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", and bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2013 at 2:39pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 10:28am / United States / Animals

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

by hinting / 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he discovered that if he hits a certain area just right, my leg starts shaking like a dog. Now he won't stop patting my head and saying, "Who's a good girl?!" FML

by woof woof?? / 06/15/2013 at 4:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, as I was crossing to the US, I got pulled over by border patrol for looking "suspicious". The female cop searched my purse and found a condom. She smirked and said, "I doubt you'd ever need that." FML

by well then... / 06/15/2013 at 1:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Love

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Love

Today, my wife decided to check her email, while I was still inside her. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2013 at 1:01am / United States / Intimacy

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Work

Today, I was using a restroom with automatic sinks and toilets. I assumed the paper towel dispensers were automatic too. I stood there waving my hands like an idiot before a girl walked in, pulled a lever, and made paper towels come out for me. FML

by paper towel virgin / 05/23/2013 at 8:24pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

by harrington61 / 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work