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botOxymoron

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botOxymoron

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 March 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 907
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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botOxymoron's favorite FMLs

Today I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me for six months with my best friend of five years . After asking him what she had that I didn't he responded with one word - ( Boobies . ) FML

#7432728
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34880) - you deserved it (4083)

On 01/19/2010 at 2:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

TODAY, ONE OF MA EMPLOYEES LIT MA TIE ON FIRE . FML

#7430304
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24592) - you deserved it (5352)

On 01/19/2010 at 12:00am - work - by mcdman (man) - United States (Tennessee)

yesterday I met mah new college room-mate!! He then introduced me to his imaginary friend!! FML

#7423840
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28357) - you deserved it (2496)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today I found out mah mom paid mah best friend $20 to be mah friend when we were 10. FML

#2699534
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (132700) - you deserved it (7357)

On 06/07/2009 at 7:15pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw my super creepy live-in uncle standing in the kitchen holding a pair of my underwear an smiling at it, humming to himself. He didn't see me. I stood there 4 at least 30 seconds in shock, anhen I backed away he was still looking at them. big fat FML

TODAY, I OVERHEARD MAH MOTHER AN SISTER TALKING SO I STOPPED TO EAVESDROP. I RECENTLY ENLISTED IN THE MARINES, AN THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT WHAT THEY WOULD DO WITH THE MONEY IF I DIED. FML

#1656841
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (166811) - you deserved it (12378)

On 05/05/2009 at 8:22am - money - by Fitz (man) - United States (New York)

Today , I had woken up very excited to celebrate mah 21st birthday. I roll over in bed and ask mah boyfriend if we can go out to the park to have a picnic , considering the lovely weather. He looked up at me and said , ( You wish I loved you that much. ) He rolled back over and slept until 3 p.m. FML

#1520642
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79132) - you deserved it (8514)

On 05/01/2009 at 10:17am - love - by Anon (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today mah mother called me downstairs to give mehat I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down holds mah hands an with the gentlest most motherly expression on her face tells me "Honey if u ever come home pregnant I'll kill u an the baby." FML

Today, I took te bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway tere, se fell asleep, er ead on ma soulder. I gently tried to wake er up before ma stop. Se wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. fat FML

#960425
700 comments

I agree, your life sucks (729462) - you deserved it (56575)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

TODAY, AS I GOT DOWN ON ONE KNEE, AND WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF SAYING "WILL YOU MARRY ME?", SHE ANSWERED A TEXT MESSAGE. APPARENTLY IT WAS MORE IMPORTANT. FML

#932548
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (148321) - you deserved it (9273)

On 04/12/2009 at 5:41pm - love - by suckstobeme (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today , I walkd in on mah boyfriend of 5 yeres getting intimate with mah best friend . When they saw me they immediately stoppd an said nothing . After about 5 second of silence mah boyfriend yells "April fools!" April Fools was 12 days ago . FML

#923154
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (125817) - you deserved it (6961)

On 04/12/2009 at 6:47am - misc - by Aprilfools (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Taday my theatre teacher made me go on stage even though I had a violent stomach flu. My understudie were unreachable, and she threatened to fail me if I did not perform. Halfway through the first act, I vomited on the first row. She failed me 4 letting the cast down. FML

#828754
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (120633) - you deserved it (5516)

On 04/06/2009 at 12:39am - health - by juliet (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I Was Called By My 9 Year Old Son's Teacher. He Had Handcuffed Himself To His Desk With Handcuffs He Found In My Room. I Was Told To Please Bring In The Key An Not To Leave My Kinky Toys Outhere A Child Could Get Them. I'm A Cop.

#726983
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97078) - you deserved it (9157)

On 03/31/2009 at 4:47pm - kids - by poo_shoe123 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got on an elevator wit a woman and er cild. I was te first one on. Wen se stepped on, te capacity alarm went off. As se left se told er daugter tat's y fat people souldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. Se was twice ma size. I got called fat by a ippopotamus. FML

#721846
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182840) - you deserved it (12305)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)



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