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bls27's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
bls27's favorite FMLs
by :x / 02/03/2016 at 10:40am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, my dad thought it was a great idea to text me and say he decided to put our dog down. I was in the middle of class and still had hours left at school. It's not fun to walk across campus holding back tears. FML
by wideeyeddays / 02/02/2016 at 3:05pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the gym. I'm 360 lbs and have finally decided it's time to change that. Some girl and her two bitch friends thought it'd be fun to follow me and belittle me at everything I did. When I mentioned it to the staff, they said that they were just "encouraging" me. FML
by Anonymous / 02/02/2016 at 5:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by Anonymous / 01/28/2016 at 11:26am / United Kingdom / Health
Today, after weeks of watching Michael Jackson videos non-stop, my boyfriend learned how to moonwalk. Now he does it literally everywhere. I can't even cross the street without him moonwalking behind me. FML
by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 7:24pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML
by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 11:35am / United States (Kansas) / Kids
by justsomesummer / 01/26/2016 at 1:09pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/24/2016 at 8:24pm / Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/23/2016 at 12:51am / United States / Intimacy
by swag papi / 01/22/2016 at 12:47am / Australia (Western Australia) / Animals
by brokenhearted / 01/19/2016 at 9:59am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/19/2016 at 6:03am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/17/2016 at 2:26am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous
Today, I felt kind of horny for once, so I texted my boyfriend to let him know he'd be getting some action later. He replied "I'm gonna fucken murder ur pussy when I get back!! :D" And just like that my sex drive once again crashed through the floor. FML
by Anonymous / 01/16/2016 at 1:40am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/14/2016 at 11:51pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…