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bls27's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
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bls27's favorite FMLs
Today, I clogged the toilet at my boyfriend's house. I couldn't fix it and was too ashamed to say anything. I can't handle confrontation, so I had to just sit there as my boyfriend's brother ended up getting blamed, then grounded for "lying" about it not being his fault. FML
Today, I finally decided to accept a date proposal from a guy who's had a crush on me for years. I got into his car, and it smelled strongly of my middle school perfume. I went into his bedroom and saw my middle school class photos hanging everywhere. Let's just say I ran home that night. FML
by hannamacintosh / 07/07/2016 at 2:37pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, after 3 days of interrupted sleep, I confronted my new neighbor about the noise his wife keeps making during their "private time". He then let me know the noise is actually from his daughter, who's mentally disabled and isn't taking the move well. FML
by Anonymous / 07/02/2016 at 12:17am / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 2:24pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
Today, while working as a highway patrol officer, I pulled over my girlfriend for speeding and was required by law to ticket her. Another officer was with me, so I couldn't not ticket her without being reported. We share a joint account, so I basically ticketed myself. FML
by Anonymous / 06/28/2016 at 10:17pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, my boyfriend invited me over to his house. I was planning on breaking up with him while at his house. Turns out, it was a proposal party. I'm now engaged because it would've been rude to say no in front of his family that had flown in. FML
by anonymous / 06/25/2016 at 11:50pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love
by EevieBear / 06/25/2016 at 5:08pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy
by hellolaina / 06/24/2016 at 8:13pm / Australia / Intimacy
Today, my sister played a prank by pretending to break into my house. I ended up nailing her in the chest with my baseball bat. Now all of my family is bitching and wants me to pay the medical bills. FML
by BlueBaronBitch / 06/24/2016 at 10:59am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my brother buys audiobooks only to play them on "mute" so that he can tell everyone that he read them later and flaunt the proof. The rest of my family think he is a genius for reading War and Peace in two days and won't listen to me. FML
by Kiki / 06/23/2016 at 7:54pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by anal-retentive / 06/23/2016 at 4:00pm / United States / Intimacy
by Malarky / 06/23/2016 at 3:10pm / United States / Love
by deanlazore / 06/22/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Maine) / Love
by Anon / 05/23/2016 at 6:49am / United States (Illinois) / Kids
by ash / 05/18/2016 at 4:00pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…