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blondeninja1

Offline (the 01/08/2015 at 2:25pm) | Search for a member

blondeninja1

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 314
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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blondeninja1's page activity

Visits<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 11:59pm<b>fortune789</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Mr_snuggels</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:20pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:02pm<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 8:32am<b>dk1991</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:46am<b>hare</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:41pm<b>rob02</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 2:12pm<b>ktmla</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 9:38pm<b>maxface</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 9:05am<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 10:36am<b>Credibleskills</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 12:34am<b>pplthinkimbad</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 7:30am<b>A07</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 1:29pm<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 11:42am<b>woiz</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 1:31pm<b>alicealiveordead</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 1:28pm<b>randomdude54</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 3:12pm

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blondeninja1's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm celebrating New Years with my cat. I made her a cake. FML

#21328260
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27441) - you deserved it (5883)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:25am - misc - by HappyNewYearsToMeAndMyCat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41652) - you deserved it (11326)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39787) - you deserved it (3586)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42737) - you deserved it (3187)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I came home and saw my cat all snuggled up with another cat on the sofa. I thought it was the cutest thing ever, until I remembered that I only have one cat. FML

#21191841
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42876) - you deserved it (4753)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47051) - you deserved it (4031)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, while at work, I asked an older customer how he was doing. He told me that he'd just lost his wife. I gave my condolences before he clarified that his wife was not dead, but was lost in Walmart. FML

#21139954
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45049) - you deserved it (6639)

On 05/14/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by oh god. - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

#21139824
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42157) - you deserved it (15781)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, when I went to the shopping centre, the automatic door wouldn't open for me. I had to stand there and wait until someone else walked by to open it for me. I suffer from dwarfism and this is a daily occurrence. FML

#21118654
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52538) - you deserved it (4008)

On 04/21/2014 at 12:11am - misc - by shorty (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I met up with an old friend of mine who acts in a TV show. I hadn't seen him in a long time, but I'd been watching episodes of the show almost daily, so when he showed up I could only see him as his TV character and not as my friend. I ended up calling him by his character's name. FML

#21114249
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40216) - you deserved it (13089)

On 04/16/2014 at 12:13am - misc - by Confused (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that the only female who shows any sexual interest in me at all is my 70-year-old neighbor. FML

#21113897
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40524) - you deserved it (4242)

On 04/15/2014 at 5:55pm - love - by gerontofuck (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I noticed something written on the top of my toaster, so I used a finger to clear away some of the crumbs, burning my finger in the process. The writing? "CAUTION: Hot surface!" Thanks, toaster. FML

#21106752
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20221) - you deserved it (44946)

On 04/07/2014 at 1:02pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48052) - you deserved it (12224)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

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