About bjr1208 : If your seeing this you are a creeper. I don't give a fuck about what you call me. "arguing on the Internet is like running a race at the special olympics, if you win, your still retarded"
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bjr1208's favorite FMLs
by KayleeXLoVe21 / 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, my drunk sister came in my room at 2 in the morning, sat on the side of my bed, fell off, knocked over my glass of water, which ruined my new phone, then got angry at me for getting angry with her. She then slammed my door, which made all the photo frames smash to the ground. FML
by bethany / 11/03/2011 at 1:36pm / Australia / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/03/2011 at 3:29am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML
by bakedplum / 11/01/2011 at 1:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 5:03am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Tom / 11/01/2011 at 1:01am / United States / Love
Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML
by Katrin / 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm / Norway / Transportation
by me / 10/29/2011 at 12:43am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 11:52am / United States / Kids
Today, I was in a rush and had to get changed in a train restroom. While changing, I leaned against the button that opened the door. Not only do train toilet doors open and close very slowly, leaving you half naked for a few seconds, but everyone in the carriage opposite can see clearly. FML
by omgomgomg / 10/27/2011 at 5:41pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 3:41am / United States / Health
Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML
by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/24/2011 at 5:47am / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/23/2011 at 7:45am / United States / Miscellaneous
- Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at,… Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven… Today, I was so sexually frustrated that I tried getting off with a banana. It was not enjoyable,…