bjr1208

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bjr1208

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9223
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About bjr1208 : If your seeing this you are a creeper. I don't give a fuck about what you call me. "arguing on the Internet is like running a race at the special olympics, if you win, your still retarded"

bjr1208's page activity

Visits<b>repaha</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 1:42am<b>teacupofsunshine</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 12:18am<b>jojocircus19</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 5:13pm<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 12:59pm<b>moosemanjinkurs</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 10:13pm<b>TheAlmightyColon</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 8:05am<b>GetRektBro</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 5:55pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:37am<b>Caroline1812</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 5:27pm<b>winterforever97</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 3:36pm<b>mikuxxhatsune</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 4:20am<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:54am<b>Kazze</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 11:01am<b>Brumbler</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 12:59pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 8:57pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 10:38pm<b>Sweerectioner13</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 8:17am<b>pplthinkimbad</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 5:20pm

Fucked!<b>repaha</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 7:43am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 7:00pm

bjr1208's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

bjr1208's favorite FMLs

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2012 at 2:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML

by ouch / 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, my boss became obsessed with a movie about a pimp. He now refers to all my female coworkers as his "bitches" and refuses to treat us like human beings. Whenever we make a mistake, he rolls his eyes and laughs, "So typical of a prostie." FML

by kufan1324 / 06/04/2012 at 11:47pm / United States / Work

Today, I was diagnosed with migraines. Any loud sounds or bright lights make it worse. I'm the drummer for a heavy metal band, so I now have to choose between really bad migraines or a career. FML

by Former Drummer / 06/03/2012 at 5:23pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health

Today, I went to Busch Gardens. Trying to cool off, I got on a ride that soaked me to the bone. For the rest of the time I was there, my bra was visible through my clothes, along with the "Hell Yeah" printed on my underwear. FML

by taylortotscx / 05/27/2012 at 1:15pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML

by aligator1009 / 05/09/2012 at 12:54am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

by T3STI / 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

by SeeingLlamas / 04/17/2012 at 5:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter sat me down for a long talk. It turns out that she thinks she is the Chosen One. FML

Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML

by Lee / 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm / United States / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a basketball game. A very pretty woman sat next to him. During the third quarter, the kiss cam came on. But it didn't show him and me, it showed him and the other girl. And they kissed. FML

by jordyn173 / 04/07/2012 at 11:19pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, I watched my cat walk to her litter box, look at it, then walk across the room to pee on a backpack. FML

by tessamarque / 04/05/2012 at 11:07am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, I realized that due to my obsession with House MD, I seem to have subconsciously developed a limp in my right leg. FML

by spougeineye1 / 04/03/2012 at 12:37pm / United States (Washington) / Health