Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bewareimannoyed

Offline (the 02/18/2014 at 9:09pm) | Search for a member

bewareimannoyed

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 10 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1338
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About bewareimannoyed : Just an average teenager. I like going on my laptop, and sleeping. Also, my life is crap.

bewareimannoyed's page activity

Visits<b>Timmeeh</b> - the 12/28/2011 at 6:28am<b>raphanne</b> - the 10/30/2011 at 3:23pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:49pm<b>gaspardls</b> - the 08/17/2011 at 6:26am

bewareimannoyed's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of bewareimannoyed's badges

bewareimannoyed's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML

#17381048
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29438) - you deserved it (3693)

On 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by moonstone15 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was in a pool locker room, surrounded by semi-naked people. While changing into my clothes, I accidentally pushed a button on my phone, causing it to make the loud, unmistakable camera shutter sound effect. Everyone definitely heard it. FML

#17217334
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32006) - you deserved it (4750)

On 07/22/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Roode (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML

#17193667
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27869) - you deserved it (2201)

On 07/20/2011 at 6:17pm - misc - by cheddar (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

#17188929
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43380) - you deserved it (3557)

On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was riding on the bus, when I felt a weird sensation on my hair. The person behind me was petting it. FML

#17182266
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29636) - you deserved it (2681)

On 07/19/2011 at 9:29pm - misc - by imnotacat (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38366) - you deserved it (2717)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML

#17131113
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35272) - you deserved it (5487)

On 07/16/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML

#17131113
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35272) - you deserved it (5487)

On 07/16/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML

#17131113
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35272) - you deserved it (5487)

On 07/16/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

#17123749
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38617) - you deserved it (7181)

On 07/15/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

#17123749
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38617) - you deserved it (7181)

On 07/15/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I met a really nice guy. He was funny, handsome, and we were both into each other. He told me his name, and when I replied with mine, it came out sounding like "I'm a bear." FML

#17071540
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17179) - you deserved it (14918)

On 07/11/2011 at 9:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32204) - you deserved it (3123)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML

#16895004
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29438) - you deserved it (3740)

On 06/28/2011 at 8:35am - animals - by hadtocleanthemess (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML

#16812585
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37695) - you deserved it (2881)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:54am - money - by alo1434 (woman) - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: