Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bebefer

Search for a member

bebefer
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1244
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

bebefer's last visitors

DraconicFelinesilentmapIwtumntpm45BabyFrancoCAMAR0kid93NixieRdzKitty19Dennisse_47black_parade

bebefer's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of bebefer's badges

bebefer's favorite FMLs

Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML

#18424133
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33141) - you deserved it (4631)

On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML

#18410529
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33632) - you deserved it (5841)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:22am - kids - by jessi - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because we watched a movie that Taylor Lautner was in, she claims they made special eye contact and they are destined to be together. FML

#18379052
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37745) - you deserved it (4034)

On 11/28/2011 at 8:33pm - love - by hot_shot (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML

#18289031
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30047) - you deserved it (4293)

On 11/19/2011 at 12:50pm - misc - by John (man) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I walked in on my flatmate squatting over the bathroom scales, completely naked. When I asked what he was doing, he replied very seriously, "weighing my testicles, you should try it sometime, if they're too heavy you may have cancer". I'm a girl. FML

#17950170
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26035) - you deserved it (2401)

On 10/10/2011 at 4:29am - health - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I woke up after a few friends came over last night. There are eggs, coins and Oreos glued to the ceiling, 10 broken jars, no food left, and most of the contents of my house are in the garden. And I'm naked and covered in permanent marker drawings of Pokémon. My parents return in an hour. FML

#17899100
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10527) - you deserved it (45438)

On 10/03/2011 at 9:19pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

#17796010
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31061) - you deserved it (3893)

On 09/21/2011 at 2:39pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while taking a crap. He actually managed to properly hit notes. FML

#17690581
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18648) - you deserved it (3594)

On 09/07/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29472) - you deserved it (2849)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML

#17610443
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31525) - you deserved it (2436)

On 08/29/2011 at 4:33am - health - by SoupCanoe - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, after a long discussion, my dad still doesn't understand how evolution works, and thinks it's a myth that was debunked a long time ago. FML

#17606157
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17019) - you deserved it (6970)

On 08/28/2011 at 4:10pm - misc - by Ryan (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in algebra, I took out my notebook. My Chinese teacher was so impressed with my "Chinese" writings on the cover that I'm now her "favorite student". Those "Chinese" symbols are actually Japanese, but I wanted someone to like me so badly that I didn't correct her. FML

#17530049
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24002) - you deserved it (4814)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:40pm - misc - by Miguel - United States

Today, at my aunt's wedding, the time for the tossing of the bouquet came and the announcer asked for all the single ladies to gather behind the bride. I was the only one. FML

#17479569
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34083) - you deserved it (3014)

On 08/15/2011 at 10:45am - love - by single lady - United States (California)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31797) - you deserved it (7250)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35161) - you deserved it (2785)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: