awkward_turtles

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awkward_turtles

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4826
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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awkward_turtles's page activity

Visits<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 5:02pm<b>Jenn_Ohio</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:58am<b>beararm</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 5:57pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 5:03am<b>Emelka</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:23pm<b>xAmybbx</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 9:33am<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 4:49pm<b>BrandyFaye</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 8:04pm<b>brewmasterg</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 9:06pm<b>Stylin_Since_97</b> - the 08/08/2011 at 4:47pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 07/13/2011 at 7:43pm<b>babygirl1023</b> - the 05/27/2011 at 7:15pm

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awkward_turtles's favorite FMLs

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

by MahSquito / 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Health

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

by MahSquito / 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Health

Today, I realised how socially inept I am, when I muttered an apology to my laptop after I noticed I hadn't plugged its charger in. FML

by KDM / 02/05/2012 at 2:39pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realised how socially inept I am, when I muttered an apology to my laptop after I noticed I hadn't plugged its charger in. FML

by KDM / 02/05/2012 at 2:39pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having lunch at McDonald's when I dropped a French fry down my shirt. It stuck out the top of my bra. Before I had the chance to remove it, a creepy man picked it out and ate it saying that it was the best French fry he had ever eaten. FML

by Anonymous / 02/05/2012 at 10:45am / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

by Jayde / 02/04/2012 at 12:12am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML

by WayTooMuchFacebook / 02/04/2012 at 12:07am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

by xX_nsn_Xx / 02/03/2012 at 9:47am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

by coleslaw / 02/03/2012 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

by ABBenzin / 02/01/2012 at 11:11am / United States / Work

Today, my nap was cut short by three bricks flying through my window. FML

by dammit / 02/01/2012 at 3:22am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

by sorrygrandma / 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, while driving to work in heavy traffic, I got so into the song I was listening to that I tapped my foot on the gas to the beat. I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2012 at 8:11pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, an intoxicated homeless man tried to chase me out of a McDonald's because he thought I was President Obama. I'm a 26-year-old white woman. FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2012 at 7:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous