antmanzero

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antmanzero

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 668
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About antmanzero : Well, I finally decided to write this out. Hmm.Basically, I'm your not-so-average 16-year old kid. I mean, yeah, I'll sit around playing video games and doing whatever on the internet, facebook and whatever, but I happen to be insane. Whether I'm clinically insane or not is for my therapist to decide. He lives inside my head. :D Ok. So. I'm in marching band and stuff. I hit shit with sticks. (ba-dum crash!) I'm a junior, not exactly top in my class (far from it, actually,) but I do what I do in life and whoever doesn't like it...well, I'll leave the rest to your imagination. ;) Adios. Ps. I like pie. And waffles. And chocolate. And bacon. Combine it all, and you get choco-waffle pie with a bacon crust... *head explodes

antmanzero's page activity

Visits<b>ThirteenThirteen</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 3:20pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 4:14pm<b>w_pony_4ever</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 9:48pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:29pm<b>bellebe1998</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 2:18pm<b>lectricpharaoh</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 2:47am<b>CaliLiving</b> - the 04/20/2013 at 10:46am<b>ManInTheMachine</b> - the 12/24/2012 at 4:17pm

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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

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antmanzero's favorite FMLs

Today, my son had to call me from his school's principal's office because he was disrupting his health class by laughing whenever the teacher said "sex". My son is 16. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 12:18am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I learned that an inspired gardening spree is not as fulfilling as some would have us believe. One punctured hand, cactussed foot and bruised ankle later, I'm beginning to regret waking up this morning and thinking, "What the hell, I'll nuke the shit out of some weeds." FML

by Baustigt / 03/28/2012 at 7:19am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got into a fist-fight with a wasp, aka a Nazi helicopter. Despite swiping at it with ninja-like skills, I lost. FML

by Stung / 02/10/2012 at 9:13am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

by Sedici / 12/18/2011 at 2:44am / United States / Transportation

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, against my wishes, my family and I went swimming with sharks. While in the shark cage, a shark got within a few feet of us. My cowardly bowels objected and caused me to shit myself. FML

by Brie / 05/29/2011 at 2:22pm / United States / Animals

Today, I let my son drive us home. After just 10 feet, he crashed into a parked cop car. It was my squad car. FML

by adogg18 / 05/29/2011 at 4:12am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I worked up the courage to confess my feelings to this girl I'm crazy about. I even wrote and recorded a song for her. Instead of listening to it, she gave it to her ex boyfriend who responded to my heartfelt words by headbutting me. FML

by StratMan / 05/28/2011 at 12:44pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I got so stressed about my upcoming final exams that, in the silent section of the library, I had a panic attack and almost passed out. No one helped me. 3 people shushed me. FML

by justletitbeover / 05/28/2011 at 8:20am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, my parents had a fight, which is a pretty normal occurrence at our house. But today, they fought over an orange. Dad is now sitting in his bedroom with the aforementioned orange. FML

by Roida / 10/26/2009 at 6:15am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, during our championship field hockey game, my mouthguard fell into a mass of geese poop. The referee made me put it back in my mouth. FML

by ewewew / 09/24/2009 at 6:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I was home on leave and having breakfast with my parents and my younger brothers. I guess I got too used to the rougher language around the Army barracks where I'm stationed. At the breakfast table I asked my Mom to "pass me the f***ing butter". FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:13pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my boyfriend for the last time for two years. When we got back from dinner, we sat in his truck for a little while to talk. A few minutes later, my mom comes flying out of my house screaming, "Satan is here, and he is tempting you!" That is the last memory he will have of me. FML

by Fwick / 03/19/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Utah) / Love