anorexicbarbie

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anorexicbarbie

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 October 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13916
  • Number of comments : 810
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About anorexicbarbie : If driving fast cars you like,
If low bars you like,
If old hymns you like,
If bare limbs you like,
If Mae West you like,
Or me undressed you like,
Why, nobody will oppose

anorexicbarbie's page activity

Visits<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 2:32am<b>1915destroyer</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 9:25pm<b>DogeDogeDoge</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 5:36pm<b>kirbyivy1994</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 10:25pm<b>kpoakes</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 6:35pm<b>Spudnik</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 10:32pm<b>in_ya_mouth69</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 9:28am<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 5:29pm<b>Wtfeven</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 8:56am<b>somochi</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 1:57pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 7:56pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 9:22pm<b>Frowny</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:03pm<b>XXFMLXXQUEENXX</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 4:53pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 12:42pm<b>Theater_Chef_3</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 2:03pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 1:18am<b>adamant84</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 6:17am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 7:39pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:49am

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anorexicbarbie's favorite FMLs

Today, while reading some chemistry notes I came across the term "solid water". Completely stumped, I asked myself, "What the hell is solid water?" Then I heard my little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4th year science major in university. He still checks the closet for monsters. FML

by uneek14 / 06/23/2009 at 10:19am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything I replied "guess". He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently I've been bitchy. FML

by tamp / 06/22/2009 at 3:47am / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother and I found a little bird that couldn't fly. While trying to convince my mom that it couldn't fly so we could keep it, I lightly tossed it in the air and it landed a few feet in front of me. Then my cat grabbed it and ate it. FML

by Ketchup / 06/22/2009 at 2:06am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend called me and I told him about the AnimeCon I'm attending, and that I wanted to go as Sailor Mars, he told me he had no idea what that was. After being mad for about ten minutes, I realized that I wanted to break up with him over not knowing what Sailor Moon was. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out to dinner with my brother. There was a very attractive man sitting a few tables away who kept glancing at me. When my brother excused himself to the bathroom, the man worked up the courage to come over and introduce himself to me. He asked me if my brother was single. FML

by Kat / 06/21/2009 at 10:45pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I realized how much I hate my apartment. Not only can I hear my creepy upstairs neighbor having sex with random hookers every few night, I can also hear him everytime he takes a shit. I honestly don't know which is worse. FML

by Steph / 06/21/2009 at 8:05am / Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya) / Intimacy

Today, we spread my uncle's ashes at my grandparent's house. We were on a hill overlooking a sunset. It was a beautiful ceremony... until the winds changed direction. Our whole family wound up covered in my Uncle. He's still stuck in my hair. FML

by Lee / 06/21/2009 at 12:23am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

by jinxofsocal / 06/21/2009 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

by anonyme / 06/20/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

by Tim / 06/16/2009 at 2:15am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

by NoBalls / 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML

by ouchers / 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of 10 months moved to Europe and we may never see each other again, so I gave her a $200 sterling silver heart necklace as a goodbye present. She gave me a pack of gum. Cinnamon, which I'm allergic to. FML

by dogs_and_toucans / 06/08/2009 at 2:47pm / United States / Love

Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doc inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML

by prostate / 06/08/2009 at 9:48am / United States (California) / Intimacy