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anorexicbarbie

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anorexicbarbie
  • Town/Country : The Divide, What's Left Of USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 October 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 9586
  • Number of comments : 810
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About anorexicbarbie : If driving fast cars you like,
If low bars you like,
If old hymns you like,
If bare limbs you like,
If Mae West you like,
Or me undressed you like,
Why, nobody will oppose

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anorexicbarbie's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to this girl who I thought was really nice, we were having an amazing conversation, and as we stared deeply in one another's eyes she asked me "Has anyone ever seen you take a shit?". She then began telling me the story of when someone watched her. FML

#3154627
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42581) - you deserved it (3265)

On 06/23/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by Jpah (man) - United States (California)

Today, while reading some chemistry notes I came across the term "solid water". Completely stumped, I asked myself, "What the hell is solid water?" Then I heard my little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4th year science major in university. He still checks the closet for monsters. FML

#3142518
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24954) - you deserved it (75343)

On 06/23/2009 at 10:19am - work - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything I replied "guess". He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently I've been bitchy. FML

#3112345
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14819) - you deserved it (63266)

On 06/22/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by tamp (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, my brother and I found a little bird that couldn't fly. While trying to convince my mom that it couldn't fly so we could keep it, I lightly tossed it in the air and it landed a few feet in front of me. Then my cat grabbed it and ate it. FML

#3110459
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17425) - you deserved it (41447)

On 06/22/2009 at 2:06am - animals - by Ketchup (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend called me and I told him about the AnimeCon I'm attending, and that I wanted to go as Sailor Mars, he told me he had no idea what that was. After being mad for about ten minutes, I realized that I wanted to break up with him over not knowing what Sailor Moon was. FML

#3108036
520 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9066) - you deserved it (73546)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went out to dinner with my brother. There was a very attractive man sitting a few tables away who kept glancing at me. When my brother excused himself to the bathroom, the man worked up the courage to come over and introduce himself to me. He asked me if my brother was single. FML

#3104897
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56740) - you deserved it (4191)

On 06/21/2009 at 10:45pm - intimacy - by Kat (woman) - United States

Today, I realized how much I hate my apartment. Not only can I hear my creepy upstairs neighbor having sex with random hookers every few night, I can also hear him everytime he takes a shit. I honestly don't know which is worse. FML

#3085922
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48614) - you deserved it (2499)

On 06/21/2009 at 8:05am - intimacy - by Steph (woman) - Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya)

Today, we spread my uncle's ashes at my grandparent's house. We were on a hill overlooking a sunset. It was a beautiful ceremony... until the winds changed direction. Our whole family wound up covered in my Uncle. He's still stuck in my hair. FML

#3078686
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45319) - you deserved it (3288)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by Lee (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

#3078421
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53097) - you deserved it (20753)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by jinxofsocal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

#3073543
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53375) - you deserved it (14857)

On 06/20/2009 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by anonyme (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

#2932416
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65323) - you deserved it (4228)

On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90644) - you deserved it (19051)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML

#2804463
815 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27065) - you deserved it (278817)

On 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by ouchers (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend of 10 months moved to Europe and we may never see each other again, so I gave her a $200 sterling silver heart necklace as a goodbye present. She gave me a pack of gum. Cinnamon, which I'm allergic to. FML

#2720666
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54834) - you deserved it (5720)

On 06/08/2009 at 2:47pm - love - by dogs_and_toucans (man) - United States



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