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amintzzy's favorite FMLs
Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML
by Anonymous / 02/06/2013 at 6:12am / United States / Kids
by wilks311 / 02/02/2013 at 9:12am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was trying to sleep away a fever, when my grandma woke me up. She was sitting next to me, shoving gummy bears into my mouth until I started choking. She laughed, ran away, and denied everything. FML
by cay / 01/30/2013 at 2:59pm / United States (New York) / Health
by notsobig / 01/29/2013 at 5:39pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML
by jay ze punk / 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love
by HereWeGoAgain / 01/24/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/24/2013 at 2:17am / Canada (Manitoba) / Transportation
by dani0810 / 01/22/2013 at 6:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by deflower / 01/22/2013 at 3:09am / United States (California) / Love
by daddy's girl / 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by airbiscuit / 01/21/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy
by AnonCat / 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML
by methane overload / 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML
by SF49 / 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm / United States / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…