About amifaiyaz : I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for a decade. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school.
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amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs
by anon / 12/11/2014 at 8:43pm / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, my pet bunny died. My little sister is distraught and practically suicidal, because apparently she playfully pointed a wand at it a few days ago and said "avada kedavra". She's absolutely convinced that she killed it. FML
by Anonymous / 12/10/2014 at 2:58pm / United States (Tennessee) / Kids
by fullalove / 12/10/2014 at 1:34pm / United States / Love
Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML
by unlovedandunfucked / 12/10/2014 at 1:16pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, I found a very light blonde long hair on my marital bed's pillow. I confronted my husband about it and after hours of arguments and me throwing his stuff out of the house, I found another. Attached to my head. My husband isn't having an affair, I'm just going grey. FML
by mastel07 / 12/10/2014 at 7:59am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love
Today, after spending a lazy day at home, I went to UPS with my mom to help her pick up a package. While in line, she sent me back to the car because I'm, "an embarrassment to be around" when I'm not wearing makeup. FML
by apparentlyugly / 12/09/2014 at 8:56pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/08/2014 at 6:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by lovethateuropeanblood / 12/08/2014 at 9:12am / Japan (Osaka) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/07/2014 at 11:35pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2014 at 4:52pm / Belgium / Love
Today, being useless at thinking of gifts, I asked my boyfriend what he wants for Christmas. I said it could be anything that I could afford. He looked me in the eye and said very seriously: "Anal." FML
by fuckered519 / 12/06/2014 at 2:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by crazy cat lady / 12/03/2014 at 6:24pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Animals
- Today, I met the man of my dreams. Hot, funny, smart, sensitive, he guesses at what I need before I… Today, I found out my hours at work were getting cut and given to another employee. Not only are my… Today, I had to work a double shift as a server with a multi-fractured foot because my boss decided…