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amifaiyaz

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amifaiyaz

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3902
  • Number of comments : 379
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About amifaiyaz : God, I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making and a madwoman to boot, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for the past 8 years.. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school. AMA :)

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>MNBOY16</b> - yesterday at 10:19am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 3:10pm<b>ijulez</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 12:54pm<b>heffastera</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 4:34pm<b>alex1010</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:24am<b>somthingstupd</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 8:20pm<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:11pm<b>pantsman66</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:39pm<b>izzy117</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 8:44am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:54pm<b>abattior</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 2:49am<b>ColbyGB</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 12:01am<b>samfate</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:08am<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 12:44am<b>Live4funny</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 8:42am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 11:20am<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 12:53pm

Liked!<b>MNBOY16</b> - yesterday at 4:19pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of amifaiyaz's badges

amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, I got angry after not being able to have an orgasm. What was I angry at? My own hand. FML

#20759304
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43007) - you deserved it (20690)

On 07/02/2013 at 2:47am - intimacy - by lonely girl (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML

#20759193
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24195) - you deserved it (62706)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

#20759121
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50047) - you deserved it (12148)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by yeshehaspornaddiction (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44687) - you deserved it (8834)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

#20758014
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53531) - you deserved it (5798)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, while at work, a creepy guy blatantly stared at my chest for a good 40 seconds. Finally snapping out of his trance, he said with a wink, "You forgot your name tag." He was right. FML

#20757330
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38033) - you deserved it (4868)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:49am - work - by Neveragain (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML

#20756438
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47575) - you deserved it (9266)

On 06/30/2013 at 5:44pm - kids - by sorry, kiddo (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML

#20754112
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53851) - you deserved it (6389)

On 06/29/2013 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41025) - you deserved it (2957)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

#20746764
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35324) - you deserved it (3001)

On 06/25/2013 at 4:43pm - misc - by mymomplucksbutthair (woman) - United States

Today, while walking around town, some guy grabbed me from behind, clutched at my nipples, and said, "That's where I always imagined they were." FML

#20746398
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51604) - you deserved it (3894)

On 06/25/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML

#20745688
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50136) - you deserved it (13809)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by dan (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was eating an ice cream cone, when I felt something drop onto my bottom lip. Assuming it was a piece of ice cream, I quickly pulled it into my mouth. After a sharp sting to my tongue, I spat it out. It was a bee. FML

#20744693
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46716) - you deserved it (6903)

On 06/24/2013 at 2:49pm - health - by SillyScotsman - United Kingdom (South Lanarkshire)

Today, my mom left for a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me and made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", and bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

#20744678
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54500) - you deserved it (4458)

On 06/24/2013 at 2:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)



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