Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amifaiyaz

Offline (the 05/19/2015 at 1:35am) | Search for a member

amifaiyaz

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8446
  • Number of comments : 380
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About amifaiyaz : I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for a decade. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school.

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>gotaplanstan</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:11am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 6:55am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:44pm<b>thatotk</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 9:43am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 9:56pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 3:08pm<b>msamake</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 2:27am<b>LoveLamp</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:00am<b>_powerslave666</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:01pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 1:31pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 9:33pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 2:35pm<b>03stroker03</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 10:45pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:31pm<b>caspergirl17</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 1:35pm<b>pantsman66</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 6:31pm<b>FleibenHolden</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 8:18pm<b>18rhunt</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 5:28pm

Fucked!<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 5:44am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:08pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 2:54am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:01pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 4:19pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of amifaiyaz's badges

amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23447) - you deserved it (42598)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

#21327463
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33273) - you deserved it (2644)

On 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML

#21326143
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30688) - you deserved it (15335)

On 12/28/2014 at 9:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I got a gift-wrapped package in the mail from my racist mother-in-law. She's always hated me, so I thought it was a bit strange. Inside was a squirt gun and a note telling me to take my "black ass" for a walk around a police station with it, followed with a smiley face. FML

#21325871
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40366) - you deserved it (2988)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was rushed to the emergency room in crippling pain, thanks to a very dangerous cluster of cysts on my ovaries that could rupture at any time. My boyfriend took this news as my way of denying him sex and broke up with me for "going to obscene lengths" to emasculate him. FML

#21325566
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34472) - you deserved it (2808)

On 12/27/2014 at 10:50pm - love - by Twysted91 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I texted my girlfriend, saying "Hey there." She quickly replied, assuring me that she's not cheating on me. Uh, okay. FML

#21325320
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32669) - you deserved it (2623)

On 12/27/2014 at 2:14pm - love - by is_that_right (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend sent me a screenshot of his phone's contact list, to show me the adorable photo of us he'd set as my contact image. I guess he didn't realize that a contact called "Side Babe" was just barely in the screenshot too. FML

#21325257
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37175) - you deserved it (2711)

On 12/27/2014 at 11:54am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my fiancé proposed to me. He said, "I could have picked anyone, but I chose you. You're a solid 2, which is average. Not a 10, but I'm glad you're a 2. Less pressure, ya know." I'm not sure if I should be more upset with the fact that I'm "average", or the fact that he thought this was romantic. FML

#21325203
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34594) - you deserved it (3836)

On 12/27/2014 at 9:55am - love - by SupposedlyAverage (woman) - United States

Today, I had to drive my husband to hospital after he tried to burn his pubes off with a lighter as part of a bet. On the upside, he probably won't be bugging me for sex for a while. On the downside, I'm married to a moron. FML

#21324724
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31311) - you deserved it (4873)

On 12/26/2014 at 2:28pm - misc - by If IQs could be negative... (woman) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, I went to break up with my psychotic bitch of a girlfriend after months of abuse. When she opened the door, her 5-year-old son ran up to me, smiling and calling me "DADDY!" for the first time. Now I don't have the heart to dump the psycho and devastate her son. FML

#21324667
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32955) - you deserved it (5121)

On 12/26/2014 at 12:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I accidentally texted my mother instead of my drug dealer. FML

#21324443
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16789) - you deserved it (47889)

On 12/26/2014 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

#21323893
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33498) - you deserved it (3473)

On 12/25/2014 at 10:17am - intimacy - by whovian - United States (Maine)

Today, my brother and I woke up early to get a sneak peek at our Christmas presents. We found our parents having sex on the couch. FML

#21323779
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34529) - you deserved it (13448)

On 12/25/2014 at 4:13am - intimacy - by VCDUDE11FTW - United States (Ohio)

Today, my ex boyfriend got married to the girl he told me was his sister. FML

#21323420
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32968) - you deserved it (2493)

On 12/24/2014 at 4:49pm - love - by single - United States (Utah)

Today, my parents refused to give my daughter her Christmas presents as an act of revenge against her father. FML

#21323347
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28877) - you deserved it (2111)

On 12/24/2014 at 3:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: