Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amifaiyaz

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

amifaiyaz

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5183
  • Number of comments : 379
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About amifaiyaz : I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for a decade. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school.

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>sdlr32787</b> - 17 hours ago<b>Jenra</b> - 23 hours ago<b>ricardof</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 7:46pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 10:04pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 4:55am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 3:21pm<b>pantsman66</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 5:07pm<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 7:32am<b>Ryiah</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 1:19pm<b>abbythemuffin</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 8:52pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:00pm<b>oufie20</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 1:26am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 2:43am<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 10:19am<b>ijulez</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 12:54pm<b>heffastera</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 4:34pm<b>alex1010</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:24am<b>somthingstupd</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 8:20pm

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 2:54am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:01pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 4:19pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of amifaiyaz's badges

amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

#21301098
120 comments

Today, my 12-year-old daughter informed me that she is eager to lose her virginity, "Because I don't want to be thrown into a volcano!" FML

#21300667
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32018) - you deserved it (3538)

On 11/17/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I'm old enough to be looking at houses to buy, but not old enough to get past the idea that they might be affordable because they're haunted. FML

#21300362
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25335) - you deserved it (5190)

On 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm - misc - by boo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27483) - you deserved it (2962)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to endure my father going on a sexist rant about how women shouldn't be allowed to go to university because it's "unrealistic" since "all women" become stay-at-home mums. This is the same man who threatened to kick me out if I dropped out of uni. FML

#21299878
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30942) - you deserved it (2407)

On 11/15/2014 at 10:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I compared our No Shave November body hair. This is how I found out that my legs are hairier than his. FML

#21299788
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27067) - you deserved it (6930)

On 11/15/2014 at 8:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I asked my dad for advice. I recently got drunk and had a one-night stand. I feel terrible, because I'm engaged to a wonderful lady. My dad just said, "You did the right thing, son, keep it up. She's gonna steal half ya shit in the divorce anyway". FML

#21299758
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19651) - you deserved it (29183)

On 11/15/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, one of my debate opponents used the "Bill O'Reilly defense" against my arguments. This involved saying "You can't explain that" about easily explained stuff, and speaking louder and louder to drown out my voice. He ended up getting a better grade than mine. FML

#21298962
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27854) - you deserved it (2821)

On 11/14/2014 at 1:39pm - misc - by shreking_bawl (man) - Norway

Today, one of the patients on the mental health unit where I work looked me up and down and said; "Well, I guess it's a popular misconception that all fat people are jolly." FML

#21298006
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29150) - you deserved it (3969)

On 11/12/2014 at 9:48pm - work - by thefatnurse - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me if I don't satisfy his "needs." By "needs", he means me wearing a diaper during foreplay. FML

#21297687
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41825) - you deserved it (4302)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by honey, no boo-boo (woman) - United States

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44019) - you deserved it (3845)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a long black hair coming out of the drain. Thinking it was my sister's, I called her in and pulled it out for her to see, only to realize I was actually pulling out a long brown roach by the antenna. FML

#21296899
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34103) - you deserved it (4379)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:56am - animals - by izzy46111 - United States (Arizona)

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

#21296872
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46373) - you deserved it (4827)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my brother offered me $20 to practice his kissing on me for his date later this evening. FML

#21296136
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42687) - you deserved it (4031)

On 11/10/2014 at 11:31am - misc - by SisterOfTard (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40165) - you deserved it (3419)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: