Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

amifaiyaz

Offline (the 07/14/2015 at 11:06am) | Search for a member

amifaiyaz

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9409
  • Number of comments : 380
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About amifaiyaz : I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for a decade. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school.

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>Kevinmeowbeanz</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Damafia</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 6:19pm<b>dlm3212</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:08am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 12:46am<b>uzinugget</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:51pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:11am<b>unknownother</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 7:22pm<b>Camwentz</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 1:56am<b>dreamful_artist</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 9:42pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 10:39am<b>gotaplanstan</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:11am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:44pm<b>thatotk</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 9:43am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 3:08pm<b>msamake</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 2:27am<b>LoveLamp</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:00am<b>_powerslave666</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:01pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 1:31pm

Fucked!<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:46am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 5:44am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:08pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 2:54am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:01pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 4:19pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of amifaiyaz's badges

amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. He put me up against the wall and I yelled, "Harder!" without thinking. I heard the entire house go silent, my dad and his friends included. FML

#20508952
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19309) - you deserved it (55092)

On 02/16/2013 at 12:27am - intimacy - by uhoh (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML

#20508270
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41073) - you deserved it (9797)

On 02/15/2013 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by Acolyte of the Bacon God (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, the attractive guy I barely speak to in my statistics class gave me a rose for Valentine's Day because he remembered they were my favorite. My husband got me a roll of quarters and told me to go buy myself "something pretty." FML

#20507681
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41035) - you deserved it (4001)

On 02/15/2013 at 1:07am - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML

#20506870
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37772) - you deserved it (8321)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML

#20505985
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13285) - you deserved it (54809)

On 02/14/2013 at 2:39am - misc - by assoutofuandme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

#20505342
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42031) - you deserved it (4683)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML

#20505035
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28390) - you deserved it (5699)

On 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by please leave... - United States (Texas)

Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door and my mum was at the top of the stairs completely naked, bent over, drying her hair with the hairdryer. It took a few moments for her to realise we were there. FML

#20504733
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31337) - you deserved it (2625)

On 02/13/2013 at 6:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (North Ayrshire)

Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML

#20503454
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12820) - you deserved it (31315)

On 02/12/2013 at 9:18am - love - by gassy - United States

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

#20503125
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40921) - you deserved it (8182)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by thefriedman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML

#20502853
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11277) - you deserved it (36012)

On 02/11/2013 at 9:30pm - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

#20502782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34619) - you deserved it (2557)

On 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Target - United States

Today, I spoke to my crush for the first time, and after a while he asked for my number. Ecstatic, I took the first piece of paper I saw out of my purse. I wrote it down and gave it to him, but he handed it back and said, "You might need this." It was an appointment card for my therapist. FML

#20502338
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31332) - you deserved it (7487)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19pm - love - by sofuckingembarassing. (woman) - United States

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

#20502122
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31142) - you deserved it (28172)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML

#20501864
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24296) - you deserved it (9645)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19am - love - by mr_loveless (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: