About amifaiyaz : I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for a decade. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school.
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amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs
Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML
by mybfthecrossdresser / 01/20/2015 at 10:08am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/19/2015 at 7:45pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by anon / 01/19/2015 at 12:35am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML
by pissed out pants / 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/17/2015 at 2:00pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love
Today, I'm a ticket inspector on a train. A suspiciously-acting guy of about 30 gets on board with two huge bags. Worried, I keep an eye on him. I wasn't disappointed when he got 5 furry toys out of his bags and started to have a conversation with them. FML
by BilletsDoudous / 01/15/2015 at 1:51am / France / Work
by imsorry / 01/14/2015 at 6:57pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Goth_Hawk / 01/13/2015 at 3:23am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML
by con135 / 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
by PO'd big bro / 01/12/2015 at 8:11pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by reallyson? / 01/12/2015 at 12:28am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His father was completely wasted, his mom was high, and his 11-year-old sister was talking about her favorite alcoholic drinks at the dinner table. FML
by Anonymous / 01/11/2015 at 9:41pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML
by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML
by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm / United States (Vermont) / Love
by sisterlylove / 01/10/2015 at 2:02pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy