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amifaiyaz

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amifaiyaz

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3704
  • Number of comments : 378
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About amifaiyaz : God, I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making and a madwoman to boot, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for the past 8 years.. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school. AMA :)

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:11pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 2:31pm<b>pantsman66</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:39pm<b>izzy117</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 8:44am<b>somthingstupd</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 1:29am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:54pm<b>abattior</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 2:49am<b>ColbyGB</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 12:01am<b>samfate</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:08am<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 12:44am<b>Live4funny</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 8:42am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 11:20am<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 12:53pm<b>screamtobeheard</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 2:01am<b>groovycrazyjoe</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 11:19pm<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 2:52pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 11:32pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

Consolation prize

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100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally hooked up with the guy that I have been in love with forever. If there is such a thing as soul mates, this guy is it. He's my best friend in the whole world. It was the worst sex I have ever had. FML

#20620111
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62892) - you deserved it (13148)

On 04/25/2013 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Live Sweet -

Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband and I, for a laugh, did our first dance to LMFAO's "I'm sexy and I know it" with stupid moves and everything. 200 guests. Nobody laughed. FML

#20618965
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48338) - you deserved it (27241)

On 04/24/2013 at 6:29pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML

#20618791
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59257) - you deserved it (4415)

On 04/24/2013 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by awkward O_o - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79466) - you deserved it (4083)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I decided to be playful and leave my girlfriend flowers and chocolates from an "Anonymous Admirer". She immediately dumped me, saying she couldn't be with someone who "isn't even as romantic as a stranger". Yep, I think I just got dumped for myself. FML

#20616571
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55140) - you deserved it (7870)

On 04/23/2013 at 7:22pm - love - by BestBF - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32665) - you deserved it (111717)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML

#20607466
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49228) - you deserved it (6436)

On 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand

Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML

#20604301
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47195) - you deserved it (9137)

On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

#20598610
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57508) - you deserved it (5589)

On 04/17/2013 at 2:14am - love - by rawdoglyfe69 - United States (Montana)

Today, trying to be friendly, I said good morning to the creepy guy at work. He responded by wordlessly hugging me. I was touched, until I realized he was trying to unhook my bra. FML

#20588922
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46246) - you deserved it (7756)

On 04/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60529) - you deserved it (20224)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, my racist, homophobic, generally degenerate grandmother visited. Within 20 minutes, she uttered multiple racial slurs, said Robert Downey Jr. will burn in hell for playing a black man in one of his movies, and yelled that she'd "whip the piss" out of me, after I asked her to leave. FML

#20584991
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34350) - you deserved it (5704)

On 04/11/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by no tea parties here, gran (man) - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is". Orgasm gone. FML

#20583515
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49363) - you deserved it (7989)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm - intimacy - by iwassoclose - United States

Today, I found out that my daughter has been stuffing my push-up bras and lipstick into her backpack, putting them on at school, and taking them off before she gets home. She's 9. The only reason I found out is because her teacher reported me to social services. FML

#20582376
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49626) - you deserved it (4905)

On 04/09/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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