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amifaiyaz

Offline (13 hours ago) | Search for a member

amifaiyaz

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6721
  • Number of comments : 379
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About amifaiyaz : I never know how to write these things.. pretty much a crazy cat lady in the making, I'm your everyday city girl living in the middle of a desert for a decade. FMLs make my mornings, right before I ride my camel to school.

amifaiyaz's page activity

Visits<b>SurfingPichu</b> - 16 hours ago<b>ricardof</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 2:35pm<b>03stroker03</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 10:45pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:31pm<b>caspergirl17</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 1:35pm<b>pantsman66</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 6:31pm<b>LoveLamp</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 11:23pm<b>FleibenHolden</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 8:18pm<b>18rhunt</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 5:28pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 9:10am<b>codytallica</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 4:16am<b>stevenJB</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 12:04pm<b>justinccp</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 5:40am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 4:11pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 10:04pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 4:55am<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 7:32am<b>Ryiah</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 1:19pm

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 2:54am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:01pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 4:19pm

amifaiyaz's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of amifaiyaz's badges

amifaiyaz's favorite FMLs

Today, the girl I've been seeing for just over a week casually let me know that she'll slash her wrists if I ever leave her. FML

#21365201
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29237) - you deserved it (2509)

On 02/28/2015 at 11:23am - love - by great (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25487) - you deserved it (2877)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up because we got into a fight over what color that confusing black and blue and white and gold dress was. FML

#21364239
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29494) - you deserved it (21100)

On 02/26/2015 at 10:07pm - love - by confused - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML

#21361029
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31791) - you deserved it (3782)

On 02/22/2015 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by bugger -

Today, my boyfriend complimented me on how he liked my freckles down below. I didn't have the heart to tell him that they were just razor rash. FML

#21360762
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28294) - you deserved it (3946)

On 02/22/2015 at 12:15am - intimacy - by awkward.. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at a family gathering with my boyfriend. Jokingly, my grandmother swatted my butt to get me to move. Out of habit, I moaned quite loudly. FML

#21358985
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17370) - you deserved it (29680)

On 02/19/2015 at 12:45am - intimacy - by heymacie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. Not an hour later, I walked in on my sister giving him a handjob in her room. And what's worse, my first reaction was just to wonder why he'd bother cheating on me for just a handjob. FML

#21358057
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37720) - you deserved it (3069)

On 02/17/2015 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

#21352119
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43242) - you deserved it (2978)

On 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, a creepy old guy kept hitting on me in line at Subway. I got scared and told him to back off because my dad was waiting for me outside. He replied that he wouldn't object to a three-way. FML

#21352037
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33884) - you deserved it (2286)

On 02/08/2015 at 11:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML

#21351381
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46124) - you deserved it (3757)

On 02/07/2015 at 6:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend tried to justify having a one night stand with some other guy, with the words, "I'm on my period, okay?!" She acted like I was crazy when I asked how the fuck that made any sense. FML

#21350975
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32326) - you deserved it (2092)

On 02/06/2015 at 3:10pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm here to inform men that, "If I fucked you, I wouldn't pull out" is not an effective pick up line. Ever. Especially on a coworker. FML

#21349737
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31484) - you deserved it (4718)

On 02/04/2015 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by No thank you (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

#21349028
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34274) - you deserved it (2322)

On 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I found out that my 2-year-old brother is afraid of his own penis. Whenever he doesn't have a diaper on, he screams, cries and yells, "Ew". FML

#21347945
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30000) - you deserved it (2451)

On 02/01/2015 at 7:43pm - health - by okseñoryoucrazy - United States (Washington)

Today, my Breaking Bad obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks." during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML

#21347719
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29946) - you deserved it (3283)

On 02/01/2015 at 11:17am - intimacy - by SKYYYLLLARRRR!!!! (woman) - United States (Illinois)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

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  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

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