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accepted850

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accepted850
  • Town/Country : Atlanta, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 October 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 789
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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accepted850's favorite FMLs

Today, campus security called me to let me know a lawnmower crashed into my car. Apparently the guy mowing the lawn lost control. My car wasn't parked by any grass. I need a new bumper. FML

#17855113
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21059) - you deserved it (1630)

On 09/28/2011 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I pretended to drunk text some friends. When in all reality I was sitting home all alone. I don't know what's worse: that I pretended that I was social and drunk, or that the friend I said I was with was actually with them. FML

#17708531
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7678) - you deserved it (34324)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was in English when I had to use the bathroom. As I was signing out, the teacher said "Don't forget the hall pass!" It was a plunger. I have to walk across my school with a plunger. FML

#17645605
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21815) - you deserved it (4447)

On 09/02/2011 at 4:44pm - misc - by d0rk_ - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML

#17607153
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25849) - you deserved it (7517)

On 08/28/2011 at 6:37pm - work - by Andrew - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

#17499822
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31083) - you deserved it (6409)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States

Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML

#17371969
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50007) - you deserved it (2382)

On 08/04/2011 at 10:45pm - misc - by Thebestman123 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

#17365713
306 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9246) - you deserved it (69968)

On 08/04/2011 at 10:35am - misc - by jshi8 - United States (Maryland)

Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML

#17324458
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31419) - you deserved it (13556)

On 07/31/2011 at 9:16pm - health - by preggo (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

#17315983
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34547) - you deserved it (11901)

On 07/31/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by creepedout - United States

Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML

#17298828
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24774) - you deserved it (4412)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (South Carolina)

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37153) - you deserved it (2629)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to drive my drunk parents home from a party. They leaned out the window and barked at everyone we passed all the way home. FML

#16968738
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28745) - you deserved it (3376)

On 07/04/2011 at 1:45am - misc - by monquiqui (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I began to walk across the street when I saw a very familiar old lady struggle across it. I walked over to help her, and only after she had blown her rape whistle and socked me in the nuts did she realize I was her grandson. FML

#16919201
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33632) - you deserved it (2353)

On 06/30/2011 at 4:18am - misc - by John - United States

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35153) - you deserved it (15382)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35153) - you deserved it (15382)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)



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