accepted850

Search for a member

Offline (the 08/29/2015 at 10:07pm)

accepted850

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 October 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3744
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

accepted850's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 1:17pm<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 11:06pm<b>trishmonster</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 2:56pm<b>alkerh</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 1:42pm<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 5:03pm<b>stripes97</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 2:03am<b>brave_josh</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 11:02pm<b>alexasyddm</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 10:39pm<b>ProjectN69</b> - the 06/10/2013 at 1:17am<b>Pesticides</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 4:44pm<b>kiskraze</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 6:29am<b>zBerryz</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 11:11pm<b>GayMatt</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 9:52am<b>olpally</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 1:10am<b>Harshdfml</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 6:10pm<b>Gwen_99</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 12:10am

accepted850's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of accepted850's badges

accepted850's favorite FMLs

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, I walked in on my flatmate squatting over the bathroom scales, completely naked. When I asked what he was doing, he replied very seriously, "weighing my testicles, you should try it sometime, if they're too heavy you may have cancer". I'm a girl. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 4:29am / Reserved / Health

Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML

by Emmy / 10/02/2011 at 2:36am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, campus security called me to let me know a lawnmower crashed into my car. Apparently the guy mowing the lawn lost control. My car wasn't parked by any grass. I need a new bumper. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2011 at 11:53am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I pretended to drunk text some friends. When in all reality I was sitting home all alone. I don't know what's worse: that I pretended that I was social and drunk, or that the friend I said I was with was actually with them. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 1:05am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in English when I had to use the bathroom. As I was signing out, the teacher said "Don't forget the hall pass!" It was a plunger. I have to walk across my school with a plunger. FML

by d0rk_ / 09/02/2011 at 4:44pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML

by Andrew / 08/28/2011 at 6:37pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Work

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 / 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML

by Thebestman123 / 08/04/2011 at 10:45pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

by jshi8 / 08/04/2011 at 10:35am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML

by preggo / 07/31/2011 at 9:16pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

by creepedout / 07/31/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML

by Username / 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

by bigjohn106 / 07/17/2011 at 8:34am / United States (Maryland) / Love