accepted850

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Offline (the 08/29/2015 at 10:07pm)

accepted850

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 October 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3449
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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accepted850's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 1:17pm<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 11:06pm<b>trishmonster</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 2:56pm<b>alkerh</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 1:42pm<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 5:03pm<b>stripes97</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 2:03am<b>brave_josh</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 11:02pm<b>alexasyddm</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 10:39pm<b>ProjectN69</b> - the 06/10/2013 at 1:17am<b>Pesticides</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 4:44pm<b>kiskraze</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 6:29am<b>zBerryz</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 11:11pm<b>GayMatt</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 9:52am<b>olpally</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 1:10am<b>Harshdfml</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 6:10pm<b>Gwen_99</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 12:10am

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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accepted850's favorite FMLs

Today, I was waiting in line to use the bathroom. I complained to the guy next to me about how long the lady was taking. I kept making jokes about it, but he never seemed to laugh. Finally, the door opened and out came a lady in a wheelchair. The guy next to me was her husband. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2012 at 12:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my dad, because I haven't spoken to him in a while, and I wanted to invite him to my graduation in May. When he picked up, I said, "Hey, how have you been, dad?" He scoffed, "Wrong number" and hung up the phone. FML

by Anonymous / 12/09/2012 at 1:43am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to see a musical that some school friends had put on. At some point in the show, the main character kicked her leg up in the air, and her high heel flew off of her foot and into the audience. The shoe hit me square in the face. FML

by ko / 12/08/2012 at 7:25pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

by Banana / 12/04/2012 at 11:04am / Puerto Rico / Transportation

Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML

by reedcarter / 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

by poopsthegame / 12/03/2012 at 2:36am / United States (Hawaii) / Transportation

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

by Sam / 12/02/2012 at 9:05am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

by childhoodupinsmoke / 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was shopping when I overheard a woman telling an employee that she was buying an iPad for her 5-year-old son. Annoyed, I turned around and ranted about how he should have more age appropriate toys. Then she explained that her son is autistic and will be using the iPad to communicate. FML

by Mimi / 11/29/2012 at 12:29am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 9:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2012 at 6:34am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money

Today, my husband surprised me by cooking a romantic dinner. I asked him why the sudden gesture. His response? "The cable was out." FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2012 at 12:49am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I woke up with a wax strip on my chest and my girlfriend sitting next to me on the bed laughing. She pulled the strip. I screamed. FML

by Ugggggggggg / 11/06/2012 at 12:11am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML

by poro123 / 11/05/2012 at 12:39am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous