_Chocoholic_

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_Chocoholic_

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 22 November 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9864
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About _Chocoholic_ : Just ask! :)

_Chocoholic_'s page activity

Visits<b>roman11</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 12:09pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 10:46pm<b>ASeeR</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 4:34am<b>night_fox1233</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 1:27pm<b>lebrockshard</b> - the 11/12/2009 at 7:41pm<b>ipwns</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 1:36pm<b>foxyouupp</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 11:42pm<b>scorpioserpent</b> - the 04/16/2009 at 10:32pm<b>metalyoshi9</b> - the 03/31/2009 at 4:44am<b>JCM</b> - the 03/26/2009 at 7:20pm

Fucked!<b>ASeeR</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 10:34am

_Chocoholic_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

_Chocoholic_'s favorite FMLs

Today, my crush and I were hooking up and as he slipped his hands up my shirt in order to "feel me up" he started rubbing around my whole torso. When I asked him what he was doing he replied "well I was looking for your boobs but apparently you have none" FML

by tinytitty / 03/22/2009 at 11:18pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was cutting a bagel, only to slice the back of my hand with the knife. As I grabbed paper towels to clean up the blood, I noticed that the bagel was pre-sliced. FML

by IHateBagels / 03/22/2009 at 2:43pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML

by nick / 03/21/2009 at 8:06pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Holidays

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house. One thing led to another, and we were just getting to the good parts when his mom walks in. After a long, awkward pause, she says "I like your socks" and walks out. She is a teacher at my highschool. I have to see her everyday. FML

by mjayne17 / 03/21/2009 at 3:04pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we got inside my mom yells to me "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML

by megan228 / 03/20/2009 at 5:16pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my dad told me he has been dating my boyfriend's mom while I was away at college. They have gotten pretty serious, and are thinking about getting married. I might be dating my stepbrother. FML

by Cindy / 03/20/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I got to my underground parking garage at work and saw my boss pulling into a spot. I thought I would show him my reverse parking skills and decided to park beside him. As I was pulling in he opened his door to get out and I smashed into it, nearly running him over. FML

by mikej1985 / 03/20/2009 at 1:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML

by itsgotime / 03/20/2009 at 2:11am / United States (Kansas) / Transportation

Today, I had just reached in my purse without looking to grab a granola bar when my boss walked in my office. We talked for a few minutes as he kept giving me strange looks and looking at my hand. He left and I realized I hadn't taken a granola bar out, but a tampon instead. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2009 at 12:41pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, I learned I made the dean's honor list for my college for the first time since attending. I asked my dad if he was proud of me, to which he replied, "when you're as successful as your brother, I'll be proud." My brother is a Chippendale's dancer. FML

by GracelandDave / 03/19/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got a phone call, and the person on the other line started speaking French. I assumed it was my friend since we usually speak French with each other, so I said in French "What do you want, asshole?". It wasn't my friend. It was a representative for the exchange program I'm applying for. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2009 at 1:17am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

by JohnMackSquirts / 03/19/2009 at 1:15am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I went to my friend's house. While she went to the kitchen, I noticed a little pink pastry on her desk. It looked really good, so I decided to take a bite before she got back. As I bit into it, a sizzling noise started, and foam overflowed in my mouth. It was a bath bomb. FML

by skywayavenue / 03/19/2009 at 1:09am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. In his front room was a giant parrot. Hoping to impress them, I went over to the bird and began talking to it proving I wasn't scared. Out of nowhere, it's beak clenched onto my nose making it gush blood on the carpet. I was hospitalized. FML

by Anonymous / 03/18/2009 at 10:57pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals