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Zestus

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Zestus

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10664
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 10 posted

About Zestus : Mm... Uni student from Tokyo who reads FML's when bored in the morning
Hi.

Zestus's page activity

Visits<b>Olliebob1619</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 5:54pm<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:05am<b>XxduckiexX</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 10:50pm<b>TheEnforcer</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 7:33pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:37pm<b>DomiLove</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:39pm<b>Juiceman105</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:23pm<b>alyssablack2012</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:20pm<b>tim_narnimee</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 7:47am<b>adelinchen3</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:23am<b>crapmaster3000</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 3:34pm<b>27inch</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 3:00pm<b>Mynameislinh</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 1:38pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 7:35am<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 6:35am<b>Shmizlish</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 1:35am<b>phew</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 12:53am<b>myoukei</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 12:38am

Zestus's FML badges

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Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Zestus's badges

Zestus's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML

#6850
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16012) - you deserved it (46492)

On 02/03/2009 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by thermos (man) - United States (California)

Today, though I'm normally unperturbed by my single-ness, I walked by some squirrels engaged in mating rituals and felt a pang of jealousy. FML

#5133
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28673) - you deserved it (3467)

On 02/02/2009 at 5:49am - love - by murphy - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML

#4489
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63466) - you deserved it (5496)

On 02/01/2009 at 5:53am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my best friend was crying because her boyfriend is a retard. I brought my thumb up to wipe a tear off her face, and somehow stuck it up her nose. FML

#4457
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20907) - you deserved it (9821)

On 02/01/2009 at 3:11am - love - by FractalSanity - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, when I was at my girlfriend's house, I farted and blamed it on the cat. I forgot the cat died 2 weeks ago. FML

#3203
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5821) - you deserved it (30617)

On 01/28/2009 at 8:05pm - animals - by kittydead - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I almost had an orgasm. Unfortunately, he had one first. FML

#3084
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48576) - you deserved it (6624)

On 01/28/2009 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by karma - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I posted on a forum asking if I could be a moderator. Instead, I got banned. FML

#3026
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6690) - you deserved it (26424)

On 01/28/2009 at 10:00am - misc - by hypebeast - United States (New York)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML

#2899
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31993) - you deserved it (9493)

On 01/27/2009 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by ottawaaa - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realised I like Britney Spears. FML

#2831
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11650) - you deserved it (28949)

On 01/27/2009 at 12:33pm - misc - by embaressed - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15525) - you deserved it (67839)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML

#2635
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41126) - you deserved it (9808)

On 01/26/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by buddy - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML

#2635
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41126) - you deserved it (9808)

On 01/26/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by buddy - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend told me that my feet smell. He was in the next room at the time. FML

#2293
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15516) - you deserved it (6790)

On 01/23/2009 at 7:04am - love - by sadass - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, computer next to me, lotion on the floor, and my dick in my hand when my roommate walked in on me. Scared and looking me right in the face he says "What's for dinner?". FML

#2177
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6749) - you deserved it (23765)

On 01/22/2009 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I thought it'd be cool and trendy to buy a Blackberry Storm. FML

#2165
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5495) - you deserved it (31056)

On 01/22/2009 at 9:38am - misc - by fecurtis - United States (Virginia)



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