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Zestus

Offline (yesterday at 11:48am) | Search for a member

Zestus

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16851
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 10 posted

About Zestus : Mm... Uni student from Tokyo who reads FML's when bored in the morning
Hi.

Zestus's page activity

Visits<b>DazzaStephens</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 12:17pm<b>fireburnspeople</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 2:24pm<b>Cookrule5</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 9:10pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:29pm<b>FuckingLifeMan</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 7:12pm<b>Scrambled</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 1:00am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 9:03am<b>EnigMind</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:02am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 3:33am<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 6:20pm<b>Gman555</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 1:42pm<b>Olliebob1619</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 5:54pm<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:05am<b>XxduckiexX</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 10:50pm<b>TheEnforcer</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 7:33pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:37pm<b>DomiLove</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:39pm

Zestus's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Zestus's badges

Zestus's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my dog for a walk down by the river. I was throwing sticks for him with one hand and talking on the phone with the other. Then I accidentally threw my phone in the river instead of the stick and was standing there talking to the stick while my phone sat at the bottom of the river. FML

#102926
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17942) - you deserved it (57315)

On 02/22/2009 at 9:52am - animals - by El Boz (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML

#97434
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15071) - you deserved it (62613)

On 02/21/2009 at 4:43pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Texas)

Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

Today, I told a girl I liked her. She replied, "Don't". FML

#75697
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55902) - you deserved it (5237)

On 02/19/2009 at 2:08am - love - by grlks (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

#38789
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48450) - you deserved it (7863)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by Shamu (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said "sorry I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML

#38126
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43613) - you deserved it (3889)

On 02/13/2009 at 4:59pm - intimacy - by Mr. Hopeless (man) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML

#30273
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22099) - you deserved it (50202)

On 02/12/2009 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Evil_Egbert (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I accidentally kicked a child down a set of steps. I work in a kids play area. FML

#24461
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14582) - you deserved it (27484)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:59am - misc - by Crog (man) - United Kingdom (Monmouthshire)

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

#23513
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13244) - you deserved it (29627)

On 02/11/2009 at 12:30am - misc - by tylerlove361 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I sent a text to my boyfriend saying 'Come over and do me.' He never responded. FML

#21094
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44519) - you deserved it (11126)

On 02/10/2009 at 3:46pm - love - by noneofthesex (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my tennis coach showed up to practice in an all white outfit. I exclaimed, "You're looking very white today!" He's African American. FML

#19641
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10056) - you deserved it (40767)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:59am - misc - by Tennisplayer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my mom I loved her a lot. Her reply? "Thanks." FML

#14836
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25222) - you deserved it (3680)

On 02/08/2009 at 11:30am - misc - by KaLa (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my best friend told me she wanted to rape my throat. I did not know that was possible. FML

#14570
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25283) - you deserved it (4874)

On 02/08/2009 at 3:04am - misc - by N (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

#11697
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78776) - you deserved it (17272)

On 02/06/2009 at 2:23pm - misc - by Noname - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized that I know more about Paris Hilton's cervix than how my government is run. FML

#6894
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7270) - you deserved it (37099)

On 02/03/2009 at 7:11pm - misc - by parishiltonsbff (man) - United States (California)



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