About Zestus : Mm... Uni student from Tokyo who reads FML's when bored in the morning
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Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22830) - you deserved it (1764)
On 11/13/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my daughter in law sent me another romantic text that was meant for her husband. Not only can't she spell for shit, the clichés she uses are horrifyingly embarrassing. The fact this keeps happening makes me want to slam her head in the oven. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22402) - you deserved it (3108)
On 11/12/2011 at 4:42pm - misc - by Username - United States
Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35696) - you deserved it (2801) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14817) - you deserved it (57596)
On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14817) - you deserved it (57596)
On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, it was so cold that I had to put slippers over my slippers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17272) - you deserved it (4157)
On 11/10/2011 at 2:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47635) - you deserved it (6157)
On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36031) - you deserved it (6103)
On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4345) - you deserved it (36014)
On 11/07/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by farhia97 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, meeting his family for the first time. I was leaning against him when he reached around, grabbed my boobs, and started making "pew-pew" laser noises, all in front of his family. I can't believe I'm dating this child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29274) - you deserved it (12637)
On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Sidney (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I spent over 20 minutes trying to convince my daughter that the word she was trying to use was "Back-pack" and not "Back-back". I never convinced her. She is 16 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22476) - you deserved it (4371)
On 11/03/2011 at 3:32pm - kids - by peonypiney (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was the 19th wheel at a party. Yes, I counted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26322) - you deserved it (3212)
On 11/01/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Tom - United States
Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18875) - you deserved it (11180)
On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh I had an itch..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13316) - you deserved it (21503)
On 10/29/2011 at 12:43am - intimacy - by me - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh I had an itch..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13316) - you deserved it (21503)
On 10/29/2011 at 12:43am - intimacy - by me - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 17 June 2013
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